QATO

Moving

2008-04-02T08:21:00.001-07:00

Yes, it's been a while since my last post. My blog has been discovered by someone local, and because of the nature of the things I post about I needed to take some time to think about whether or not that was okay. I mean, I don't care who reads the blog, but this person figured out who Fidget and I are based on my entries. With the boys still being young, I'm not okay with that.
So...

I will be moving. This blog will no longer be updated. If you are interested in following me, please send me an email. Once I have figured out where I'm relocating to, I'll give you the new addy.

Thank you for your patience and understanding.

Made a Big Payment

2008-03-12T08:19:00.000-07:00

I have been waiting to be able to make this post. I have been fixated on it, couldn't wait for the moment to come...

I sent in a payment to one of our credit cards for $6000. WOO-HOO!!

Now comes an explanation as to why and how. Most financial gurus would not agree with the way that Fidget and I did things. Many of the financially-aware will scratch their heads and chuckle. In no way, shape, or form am I telling anyone, anywhere to follow our plan. But I am always a little curious how people come to the financial decisions that they do, so I will share some info.

A couple of years ago, we had made a really poor decision in car-buying. We bought a Chevy Avalanche (it was orange, and yes--part of me still misses it). It was a completely un-calculated, unnecessary, EXPENSIVE purchase...and we got a loan to do it. A loan with a crappy interest-rate (because the dealer we went to was a schmuck) and really high payments, because I insisted on a 4-year loan.

So, last year we traded cars numerous times to get our debt down, as well as our payment. In January, we made the last trade that we need to (assuming our cars keep running and don't get totaled or anything). In order to do that, I used a credit card check at 0.99% interest to make a down payment of $6000. Normally, I would never have considered doing that, not even for a second. But we had a plan to pay it back before the 90 day low-interest rate was up. So we used our tax return money and I sent the check off.

In hindsight, I can see all kinds of things that we could have done differently. Perhaps I will post about that another time.

For now, I'm going to do a little happy dance--I just made a credit card payment that cut our total credit card debt in half. SWEET!!

Excel

2008-02-27T12:38:00.001-08:00

I've been spending my free time creating Excel spreadsheets that track our financial info. Back when I worked for the local hospital I created budget and billing sheets that were interactive. Now, because I haven't worked intensively with Excel since then, I'm having to re-teach myself all the little tricks I used to use on a daily basis.

Anyone out there use Excel for this and have any tips/tricks they'd like to share?

Thank You

2008-02-21T13:39:00.000-08:00

I still can't believe how many people emailed me for links to the local news and also sent along prayers, reiki, positive wishes.

Since this is technically off-topic for the year, this will be my last post on the bus crash.

What happened?
A van with an unlicensed, 23 year old driver at the wheel was traveling (very fast, though that's not yet "confirmed"), ran a stop sign and broad-sided the bus. The bus tipped over onto a pickup truck. The driver of the van has been arrested.

4 children died. A third grader, a fourth grader, and two 13 year olds. Two that died were brothers. All the other injured are in stable/fair condition, with the exception of our friend's son who is still in ICU.

There were more than 20 ambulances on the scene, 4 helicopters, more fire trucks and rescue rigs than could be counted. One of the boys (who has a pelvis that's broken in 3 places) was helping to round up the kids from his mom's daycare at the scene, he was up and walking around trying to help. To say that the heroism displayed that day is staggering would be a gross understatement.

To say that it's a miracle that more weren't seriously hurt or killed would be an even bigger understatement.

Pause in Posting for today

2008-02-19T16:20:00.000-08:00

I was prepared to post an "on topic" entry today.

A very serious bus crash occurred near me. My partner, Fidget, is an RN and is working at one of the receiving hospitals. My former ambulance crew was one of the primary responding crews.

3 people are dead, at least one student. Several are critical. Many, many students have other injuries: imagine, a bus that's FULL (there were 40 students on board) rolling on it's side. No one is buckled in except the driver, and many of the windows were likely broken. A terrifying scene to say the least.

UPDATE 6:43PM: One of the news stations is now reporting that all 3 that are dead were students. Jesus.

Please send your prayers, positive thoughts, etc. to the rescuers, doctors, nurses, ancillary staff, parents, friends, students, and anyone else you can think of.

For those who aren't aware, I live in a very rural area. For the most part, everyone knows everyone else. One of the children that's in critical condition is a friend of Fidget's oldest, he's also the son of a friend and fellow RN.

In this area, every time a pager goes off, a code is announced, a disaster occurs: heroes rush to the scene and to their staging areas. That happens everywhere. When it happens here, the lives you are trying to save are friends, relatives, neighbors, and maybe even your own kids.

This and That

2008-02-11T13:52:00.000-08:00

Things are progressing fairly well in our decision to decrease our debt.

Many readers (more than I realized I had) have asked me to disclose our income. I'm not ignoring you, I'm just still thinking about it. My hesitation has everything to do with protecting Fidget and the boys. If the time comes when I determine that absolutely no harm can come from disclosing our income, then I will absolutely do so. Until then--sorry. No can do.

In somewhat related news, I'm trying to learn what I can about investing. So far, for the amount we're willing to invest, it would seem that CDs would be our only option. If I come up with anything else, I will certainly mention it here.

Glitches and Taxes

2008-02-05T08:57:00.000-08:00

Anyone else have trouble signing in to blogger last week? Don't know if it was on their end or my end, but my password wasn't working. Apparently whatever the glitch was, it's fixed.

Put together our "stuff" from 2007 for our tax appointment. Normally I'm anal retentive about saving and filing anything that pertains to taxes. This year was a mad scramble, as apparently I lost my head (and a number of receipts) last year.

I have heard rumors about the great "tax rebate" the most Americans are supposed to qualify for. I could go on and on whilst standing on my soap-box about what a hair-brained idea that is, but won't. The sheeple of our great nation are excited, and that seems to be enough for them. In the meantime, Bush has proposed a $3 TRILLION dollar budget for '09--complete with MANY cuts that will impact the same people he's throwing a few hundred dollars at in the form of the rebate. Nice.

As for me? I am in a most unique financial position: I have more money than my own government. I could not be less happy about that. Think about it--unless you were starting a new business (alone or with others), would you consider working for a company with less money than you? Perhaps, if it was a hobby, but then don't they call that volunteerism? I am most disturbed at what is going on in our country. I have written letters, emails, made phone calls--hopefully I'm not the only squeaky wheel.

Debt

2008-01-21T11:57:00.001-08:00

Debt is a bummer. But as part of our goal to be more financially healthy, wealthy and wise--it must be addressed.

I put our numbers together a couple of weeks ago. Ugh. We have approximately $41,400 in debt (car loans, credit cards, medical bills) plus student loans and mortgages. Well, I don't know if mortgage should be plural or not. We have a mortgage on the house we live in, plus a mortgage on the house we're selling Contract for Deed. So I'm not sure if we count the second one or not. Whatever. Bottom line--that's a lot of debt.

It's entirely unreasonable for me to set a goal to have it all paid by the end of the year. I've run the numbers every which way and it can't be done. So, I've set a goal of paying off half. I'd like to see the number decreased to $20,000 (plus student loans and mortgages) by the end of the year. It doesn't look totally impossible, but it might be kind of a big stretch. We'll see how close we can come. Wish us luck, we'll need it.

A reply to Dawn's questions

2008-01-13T12:04:00.001-08:00

In the comment section of the previous post, Dawn asked:
What is the easiest way that you have found to live a simple life?
What to you is the difference between simple living and frugal living, if there is one?
How would explain what your goal is by leading a simple life?

I'll take them one at a time.

Q: What is the easiest way that you have found to live a simple life?
A: I think for me, the answer to this boils down to some questions that I ask myself:

Do I really need it?
What will I do if I don't buy it/have it? (In other words, can I substitute something else?)
How will this impact my overall financial picture?
Will what I'm doing have an impact (on my life or someone else's) a year from now, and is it a bad or good impact?
Will it enable me/my family to save time, money, space, energy, etc. in some other way?

Q: What to you is the difference between simple living and frugal living, if there is one?
A: I think the 2 work together. When you're trying to live frugally, you also live simply. When you're trying to live simply, you also live frugally. For me the 2 go hand in hand. I think of living simply as being more related to the things I surround myself with, while I think of living frugally as more of a commitment to financial health.

Q: How would you explain what your goal is by living a simple life?
A: Gosh, good question. I hadn't thought about this. I think that, in a nutshell, it's about not complicating the heck out of things (which I have a tendency to do). It's about accepting that some things don't need to be perfect, that they can be "good enough". For example: Do I REALLY need a new (blender, car, house, etc.) or is the one I already have good enough?

One of the areas Fidget and I have been discussing is the difference between "simply living" and "simple living". To me the difference is pretty big, and includes the difference between a basic need (food, water, shelter) and the "needs" to be able to enjoy life (electricity, cable, running water).

"Simple living" is merely finding out how much we can do without.
"Simply living" is what we need to continue existing.

In looking at our cable needs, we had discussed getting rid of it completely. The problem with that is, because of the area we live in, we cannot get ANY channels with the rabbit-ears. So that wasn't really an option we liked (and Fidget threatened to self-destruct if she had to miss Desperate Housewives). We finally decided to go back to the basic package, just ABC, CBS, NBC a couple of others. That would save us $20/month over the package we had and still provide us with some entertainment. When we called to change our service, we were offered a promotion to save $30/month on the package we already had. So we did that instead.
In addition to that, we were offered $15/month internet (which we already had for $55/month with the same company). Now, these are promotions and won't last forever, but for the next several months, we're $ ahead.

So, in the above example, by my definition (dunno whether it's right or wrong), "simply living" would dictate that we don't need cable or TV or DVDs or anything like that. "Simple living" is cutting back as far as we can, or in this case saving the most amount of money that we can.

Good questions, Dawn! Thanks for asking!

QATO topic for the year

2008-01-10T14:04:00.001-08:00

QATO was originally created to further my interests in various topics. Over the last couple of years (both here and at it's previous address) I've gotten out of the swing of things and it became more of a "keeping up with the family" kind of blog. I'll try to keep some of that, but I'm also wanting to go back to the idea that I started with. So, I've picked my topic for the year: living simply/simply living.

What are some things that work to reduce/eliminate debt? Can we use the 3 R's consistently and with ease in our community? How much more can we REALLY cut back? Will I die without the movie channels? (so far I'm making it just fine) And many other similar topics. My goal is to blog twice a week. I tried for daily posts and I failed utterly. Twice a week seems like something that's attainable and is an improvement over the unpredictable schedule that I post on now.

So, send in your thoughts, questions, answers, remedies, etc. and I'll get to work on them. I hope all of my readers (yes, both of you) have a wonderful 2008.

Just when the New Year was looking good...

2008-01-03T19:52:00.001-08:00

My home state let me down. I want to move to Canada. Obama and Huckabee. I can't even pick a "lesser of two evils" out of those two.

Speechless.

6 more days, just 6 more days

2007-12-19T13:24:00.000-08:00

Well, apparently, I went a little nuts whilst shopping. In an effort to make sure that everyone got a little something that they wanted in addition to the things they NEEDED (such as socks for the boys--what in the world do boys do that wears out their socks so quickly?!) I must have lost my head.

I'm on a first name basis with the FedEx and UPS drivers. Yes, it's that bad. They stop by my house a couple of times a day with packages of things that I had forgotten that I ordered. It's kind of fun, actually. "OH! I forgot about that!" My rule this year, since I shopped online, was that whatever I bought using a credit card had to be paid off in 2 months. Shockingly, so far, it will all be paid in one month.

The drivers are here so often that I almost feel bad not having them in for coffee. I mean, when my friends stop by once a week or so I have them in for coffee...what about these poor men (so far no women drivers, so I'm not being sexist here) who brave the cold to deliver underwear from Victoria's Secret for Fidget, socks from Wal-Mart for the boys, MP3 players, PJ pants, a video game, and the other miscellaneous items that fill the space below my tree? I think "Minnesota Nice" dictates that when someone is at your house almost more frequently than people who live there you have to have them in for bars or hotdish. But then I'm not really from here, so does that excuse me? Dear reader, you can see the quandary I'm in...

Ah, the tree. After 15 years of use, it's time to retire it after this season. Being the daughter of a fire chief, I was brought up fearing the extreme flammability of a real tree, so we've always had artificial. Being an allergy sufferer, I'm grateful for that. Our tree looks like a Charlie Brown reject. Couple that with the fact that we didn't even bother to put ornaments on it this year and it's quite a sight. 2 things of net lights and a lonely angel on the top. Why no ornaments? Well, it's like this: We have cats. And dogs. And every year they team up. The cats knock the ornaments off the tree, then the dogs chew them up. We thought about putting cat/dog treats on as ornaments, but after 15 years of faithful service to my family we just couldn't do that to the poor tree.

Brotherly love. It's fabulous this time of year. We left some cookies on the counter to cool off before putting away and the love was apparent. The cats batted them around, knocking many to the floor. The dogs gladly accepted the cats' gifts to them, and in turn left us little red and green presents of their own...on the rug in front of the oven.

What a grand season...Thank the heavens it only rolls around once a year.

Happy Holidays to all of you! And may your home be filled with love, laughter and lots and lots of spiked eggnog to deal with the love and laughter.

Hodge Podge...and a Reader Question

2007-11-21T12:40:00.001-08:00

We're having the whole gang here for Thanksgiving again this year. It was so much fun last year, we hope it will be the same this year. There have been some changes to the characters on the playbill this year, so we'll see.

My family (all 3 of them...quite a contrast to Fidget's thousands of relatives) aren't coming. My uncle is ill so they are staying home. So it will be Fidget's mom and dad, bro and sis-in-law, the sister-in-law's brother's kids (6 months and 3 years old), Fidget's 3 boys and of course Fidget and I will be there unless we decide to run away from home in the middle of things.

My goddaughter is in the Navy and had to choose between coming home for Thanksgiving or Christmas, so she won't be coming home until mid-December.

Fidget and I have discovered the stress/pain connection: the more stress I am under, the more unmanageable my pain becomes. So...I dropped 2 of my classes and will be going to school as a half-time student until we can get the pain under control. I refuse...REFUSE...to live my life on narcs. I'm not going through another bout with drug addiction--I did that once, and once was enough for me. Besides, I'm dopey enough most days without the chemicals--imagine if I were any dopier? ;-)

A reader asked: "What's it like to not have parents, especially on/around the holidays? How do you get through the holidays?"

Good question. It's tough, for me anyway. I don't pretend to speak for anyone else here. My dad has been gone 3 1/2 years, Mom's been gone for 6 1/2 years. I still really, really miss my mom. There are so many things I wish I would have said or done when she was alive. I wish I would have spent more time with her when I moved up here instead of pursuing my own stupid social life. Go to the bar or spend 5 minutes with mom? Bar with my friends. I was 22 when I moved here, so I was young.

I wish I would have stayed longer the last day I saw her awake and alert...but dad wanted to go out for dinner, so I went with him. I would give ANYTHING to have that day back. Mom even asked me to stay...I told her I was heading out with dad, but that I'd see her in the morning. Mom woke up the next day long enough to look at me, say "I love you"...and that was it. When does it get easier??? I run through those couple of days over and over and over, especially around the holidays. I think about all the times I came home from work, changed clothes and left to go out with friends instead of spending time with my mom. God, sometimes I never even said hello. Just yelled "Love you, bye!" as I ran out the door. I digress...

How do I get through? Watching Fidget's boys grow up. Spending time with them, trying not to "hang around" too much--but trying to be there "enough" so that they know how much I love them. Realizing how precious every moment is--the giggles and tears that we share, the milestones, the discussions, the rewards and punishments. The heart-to-heart talks, the "I hate you's", the "I love you's", the snot and puke, the fevers in the middle of the night, the bad dreams that need a hug, a hug from a 13 year old boy who doesn't care that his friends are watching. The silly, mundane things: the 13 year old who thinks the car I bought his mom is "Awesome, I can't wait to drive it!!" (and the resulting heart palpitations at the thought)...the same 13 year old who calls my car a "grandma car".

The 10 year old who wants to wait just a few more minutes before he comes in...so he can catch the sunset. The 8 year old who's bladder hasn't caught up with the rest of him, but who knows that there is no judgment in our home (unlike at his dad's, who makes him wear a diaper at night). Having the 10 year old tell me that he thinks I'm a hero...while his brother yells at me in anger that he hates me. Knowing that before the day is over, likely the hour, the yelling brother will be in my arms sobbing--because he really does feel bad that he might have hurt my feelings.

Watching them all learn about the unconditional love that makes it all work. There is more laughter than tears; more discussion than yelling; more honesty than fear, even in wrongdoing. That's what gets me through. There is nothing more amazing than the perfectly imperfect love that a family shares. That's what gets me out of bed when I hurt so much that I just want to lie in bed and cry. That's what will get me through Thanksgiving, Christmas, and anything else that might come my way.

May you all be as blessed as I am...and may we all remember to take a moment or two in the hustle and bustle of it all to be grateful.

Where does the time go?

2007-11-09T14:57:00.000-08:00

It seems like it was only yesterday I updated this...and here an entire week has gone by.

Halloween candy--we froze some, have been pawning it off on friends who come to visit, and sent some home with the boys. And yes, erm, we have eaten some.

I signed up for my classes for next semester. It doesn't look good. There's only one class being offered that I NEED, which stinks. So I'm basically taking 3 classes as fillers--to keep me at full-time student status. That's a bummer. Hopefully I'll like the classes that I'm stuck signing up for, otherwise Spring semester is going to be torture.

A guy from our gas company is in my basement as we speak. When we kicked our furnace on, we noticed a bad sounding noise every time it kicked on. So we called, he came and looked at it--motor was going. Ugh! Luckily--and this is the only time in my life this has worked in my favor--we're part of the $10/month maintenance plan. Fidget and I had just been talking about canceling because, well, who ever actually uses it? And then the motor went. And it's covered! So is the labor--which is an especially good thing. It's been a pain in the neck, for us and the poor fix-it guy. Now he's got the new motor installed and he just came upstairs to tell me that there's a whole other problem. Sigh. It is getting chilly in here (58) so it would be nice if it started working soon. But, despite all the hassles, I have to say this: Scott, the repair guy, is absolutely wonderful. Fidget and I will be writing to the "powers that be" at his company to tell them how wonderful he is.

I've been battling rheumatoid like never before. My knees are so swollen that I can't even wear jeans--just HUGE, baggy sweat pants. I haven't been able to walk to my car for over a week, so I haven't been to my classes. 3 out of my 4 professors are being wonderful, the 4th isn't being terrible, but isn't being at all nice about it. Oh well. Worst thing he can do is fail me--and it will be hard for him to justify doing that when my exam scores are keeping up with the class average.

The pain factor has been unbearable--I'm actually seeking a solution (at least a temporary one) via western medicine. Hopefully we can come up with something soon--this is miserable.

Fidget and I are starting to gear up for Thanksgiving. We'll be having the whole gang (Fidget's family and mine) here again. We all had a blast last year, hopefully that will be the case again. I'm also hoping the kitchen doesn't get SO hot, like it did last year. I'm sure the wine had nothing to do with it. ;-)

11/2/07

2007-11-02T09:54:00.000-07:00

So...I was all excited for Halloween. I just love to see the little ones in their costumes, especially the ones that are homemade. Fidget went out and bought all kinds of candy, we turned our light on early...and had 5 trick or treaters total. FIVE. A friend brought her son and 2 friends, then later in the evening 2 older kids showed up. That was it. The last two weren't even in costume. We gave them candy anyway...we'd already been TP'd (although it wasn't bad--just one long strand hanging from a tree branch). Friends who live 2 blocks away (in our old house) had so many that they ran out of candy. Real estate agents are right--location is everything.

Now we are left in a bit of a dilemma--we have oodles of candy left. We've given some to our friends who have come over for coffee. One of the cats stole a Hershey and gave it to one of the dogs. I've eaten more than I care to admit, as has Fidget. The school doesn't want it. The nearest shelter is almost 2 hours away from us. What do I do with all this candy??? I suppose I could save it for next year... ;-)

A beautiful day

2007-10-26T12:54:00.000-07:00

And I had to waste half of it taking exams. Yuck!

It's about 50 degrees today, beautiful blue sky. I even opened a window or two. There won't be many more days like today this year, so even though I have lots of housework to catch up on I wanted to enjoy the weather.

School is going pretty okay for both Fidget and me. Nothing too over the top, just mundane day to day crap.

The last couple weekends that the boys were here we canned apples. They LOVED it and had a blast! We had to promise we'd do it again next fall--if only they knew!! We plan on having a garden next year, so if that works out we'll be canning a lot more than apples!

Last Sunday the boys carved pumpkins. Even #1 at 13 enjoyed himself. We have a white pumpkin--I had never seen a white pumpkin before. Is that some new crossbreed or something, or have I just been in the dark?

My One Money Advice

2007-10-17T12:32:00.000-07:00

I've been tagged by Dawn over at Frugal for Life

Apparently I'm supposed to come up with one piece of financial advice...Hmm...

I would say, "Spend less than you make."

This means that credit should be used as only a last resort for a large purchase (such as a house) or in an emergency...a true emergency. No, needing a pair of blue heels doesn't qualify.

When Fidget changed jobs (about 8 months ago), we watched her paychecks for a couple of months. We traded in a vehicle for one that got better gas mileage, did some home improvement stuff, and basically re-did our whole budget. It worked very well with her new income. Except that her new income was falsely inflated by overtime which was caused by trainings and such. And we didn't take that into account. ARGH!

We are now left with a $1500/month gap between what we thought our income would be and what it actually is. If we had maximized the "spend less than you make" wisdom, we wouldn't be living paycheck to paycheck right now. Well...and if we hadn't racked up about $5000 in credit card debt. DOH!

In the past, I have used my credit cards pretty much every month: but I paid off the balance in full each month. So this whole ball of credit card debt is new to me.

Yep, I would definitely say "spend less than you make".

I can't believe it's been almost a month...

2007-10-15T13:20:00.000-07:00

since I updated the blog. Things have been crazy nuts here.

Fidget's dad is now in the stem cell collection part of an autologous bone marrow transplant. The actual transplant is scheduled for December.

I dropped my poetry class (which was a horrible, terrible disappointment) and picked up an Independent Study--which has been taking me hours a day.

I'm still fighting with our NEW internet provider about all the outages. I'm ready to go back to dial-up. At least that was reliable. Slow, yes. But reliable.

The boys are all good, except #1's grades. But then his dad doesn't seem to think that grades are all that important...it's sports that count, don't ya know? Jesus...don't even get me started.

I'm reading like a mad woman, trying to stay caught up in all my classes. I can't remember a semester where I had so many damned tests. At least one a week in one class or another.

The dogs need a haircut, but since the last "rat" incident I'm putting it off. That and I don't know how to "trim" their hair and the average temperature has been in the upper 40s, lower 50s, and I don't want them to freeze. I did buy them jackets last year, but Fidget thinks they're ridiculous. ;-)

That pretty much ties up all the odds and ends.

So much for weekly postings...

2007-09-24T18:18:00.000-07:00

Where does the time go? I suspect it goes to that black hole where all the missing socks end up.

I stole this from Dara even though I don't really know her. Feel free to post your answers in the comment area, or link to your own blog via comments.

1. Do you have a tattoo? Yes, I have 7.

2. How old are you? 33

3. Are you single or taken? Happily taken

4. Eat with your hands or utensils? Depends what I'm eating

5. Do you dream at night? Usually

6. Ever seen a corpse? More than I care to think about

7. George Strait or Jay Z? Probably Strait

8. How did we meet? Well, um, Dara, we haven't

9. What's your philosophy on life and death? It's all a big circle

10. If you could do anything with me, and have no one know, what would it be? Um...Have a cup of coffee?

11. Do you trust the police? For the most part, yes

12. Do you like Country music? Yeah...but don't tell anyone that

13. What is your fondest memory of me? Hmmm...I like your blog...

14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? I would have all the parts, and the same weight, that I had when I was 21

15. Would you cheat? No, not on anyone or anything

16. What do you wear to sleep? socks

17. Have you ever peed in a pool? Yes

18. Would you hide evidence for me if I asked you to? Most likely not

19. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? Whatever you wanted, I imagine

20. Which do you prefer - short or long hair? Don't have a preference. I like my hair shorter.

21. Do you sing in the shower? Only when I'm home alone

22. What's your favorite color? Red...or maybe blue...or...

23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be? My mom

24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you? I can wiggle my eyebrows

25. What was your first impression of me? I like your "tell it like it is" style

26. Have you ever done drugs? Yep, a long time ago

27. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you? I just did...

28. What is your first name? Stacey

Reader Question

2007-09-01T12:40:00.000-07:00

Yes, dear readers, (I can pluralize now, I have 2 regular readers!) ;-) it's time again for another reader question. And any of you can send in a question whenever the urge hits you, as occasionally I tackle more than one in a post.

Q: What jobs have you done in your life?

A: Good question, an easier answer might be to tell you what I haven't done, but that's not what you asked. So here goes...

I did lawn maintenance for 2 realty companies when I was 8-10 years old, a shop assistant when I was 12-13, a groundskeeper (glorified title for garbage picker-upper) when I was 14-15, I worked as a dishwasher/dietary aid/waitress/caterer/baker/cook/supervisor for the same company from 15-20, I was a counselor in a PMIC (psychiatric medical institution for children) from 19-21, I was a clerk at a gas station from 20-21, a waitress at a fine dining restaurant, a hostess at a different fine dining restaurant, a cocktail waitress, a bartender, a painter, a CNA (certified nurse's assistant), a telemarketer (which I HATED), stand up comedienne (or comedian, I don't really get hung up about all the gendering stuff), house manager for an adult group home, I was in a band for a bit (I sang), a mental retardation technician (don't holler at me about being PC--that was my title), a factory worker, an EMT, a cardiopulmonary technician...and probably a few other things that I can't think of right now. I've also volunteered loads of hours for suicide hotlines, domestic violence programs, sexual assault programs, and was a featured speaker at a statewide crime victim workers' conference.

For the most part, I think that about covers it.

And We're Off!

2007-08-29T12:30:00.000-07:00

School started for our university on 8/27. I already have a shit load of homework. I'm taking Short Story, Novel, Abnormal Psych, and Poetry (this one taught by Fidget's favorite poet, who has many books already published and who is going to allow our class to preview some stuff that will be in his next book which is due out next year. Way cool!). To say that I have a ton of reading would be a gross understatement.

Fidget is taking stats. She's not the greatest at math, so instead of doing stats online with the rest of her classes to finish her degrees she's opted to take it at the same univ. that I attend. We get to ride together 3 days a week, so that's pretty great in my opinion!

Fixed our cable problems well, it fixed itself, we never really did figure out what was wrong, so that part of the communications problem is taken care of. Our cell phones are still dropping more calls than we're able to complete. Our home phone has been re-installed, so we are able to receive incoming calls on that at least. I'm ready to chuck both of our cell phones onto the highway under the wheels of a big rig. Our bill keeps going up, and no one can explain why--nor can they fix the problem. It's a mess.

I will try to update more frequently now that summer is over, stay tuned for more reader questions.

Communications Rant

2007-08-22T12:48:00.000-07:00

We've had several weeks of issues with our internet, phone, tv, and cell phones. I'm about ready to give it all up.

I'm irritated with my email/internet/phone provider. Here's the story... A few months ago (okay, many months ago), there was a tornado in Kansas. A gal who's blog I read lives in Kansas. I wasn't sure where she and her partner lived in relation to the tornado, so I had emailed her just making sure they were okay, stuff like that. A month goes by and I didn't hear back from her. Another friend calls and wonders why I never responded to her email, then I start emailing my personal account from my blog email...and none of them arrive. So I check my settings, make sure I haven't accidentally changed important things or blocked anything. Then I call my ISP. Apparently there was a junk mail filter, with a separate pick up point (or whatever they called it). So I go there, and there are hundreds of emails. So I write KS blog woman back, and apparently she thinks I don't care, because she doesn't reply. In the junk mail thing are also editing job opportunities, invitations, emails from my university, plus all kinds of emails from family and friends. During the time that all the email that I WANTED was going to the junk mail, my inbox was daily filled with all kinds of spam that I DON'T want. Nice.

So, I think I finally have that figured out. Now, a little background here: our cable company provides both our phone and internet. They are the only non-dial up service in my area that reasonably reliable. Both the phone and the internet stop working pretty frequently, but it's normally only for about 10 minutes at a crack, and the techs can't find anything wrong. So we live with it. Now it's going down randomly for anywhere from the usual 5-10 minutes to 3 hours!

So, I call my cable company. I explain who I am, account number, etc. I explain the problem. I spend more time on hold. Someone else comes on the line, and I explain it to him. He doesn't see a problem. I tell him that my service was not working while I was talking to him, and that I didn't think it was reasonable to have to pay for service that wasn't at least reasonably reliable. He insisted that he didn't see a problem. So I asked him if there was something I could check on my end of things, that maybe a cable came loose or something. He had me check all of the cables I had checked before I called him. Still no internet or phone.

He says he's going to send me an email while he's got me on the line and that I should let him know exactly when it arrives. Okay. Now...the gentleman I was talking to definitely knows more about all of this stuff than I do: but how the hell did he expect me to get an email when I had no internet? But I kept my mouth shut and made small talk with him (he really was very nice) while we waited. He was curious about where I lived, told me what a wonderful customer I was, thanked me for not yelling at him, told me all about the overtime he was working, yadda-yadda-yadda. It was a nice conversation. After about 20 minutes, he asked, "Have you STILL not received my email?" Um, no. I still don't have phone or internet (I had called from my cell phone). "Well," he says, "obviously something's wrong." Hmm...ya think?

There is still no fix to the problem. I wish that Comcast or someone like that was in our area, but by the time we get that, we'll have internet wristwatches that can be bought at wally world for $3.99.

Fidget and I are weighing the pros/cons and costs/benefits of switching back to a regular landline telephone. At least then I could call the cable company about the internet without wasting minutes on my cell phone.

Which brings me to the cell phone company. I've had the same cell phone company for the last 8 years. They're reasonably reliable (which, again, is a feat in this area), and their costs are competitive. And then they were bought out by another company. And we have had nothing but problems since. When the buyout occurred, we were assured that nothing would change. Our service, bills, etc. would all stay the same. Right. I told Fidget, "Hang on, 'cuz we're about to be taken for a ride." I hoped I was wrong. But I wasn't.

Our first bill from new company was $4 more than it had been with old company (which, within $.03 never changed from month to month). So we called. And were given the runaround, and after an hour of holding and talking to various people still didn't have a reason why, but were told that the following month (this month) our bill should return to normal. I wasn't happy about it, but it was no longer worth my time.

So we get our bill this month, and it's gone up another $4. That's already $8 more per month than we ever paid our old company. So I called the company. And was given the runaround for about 25 minutes. Fidget called the company and was given the runaround for 1 hour, 48 minutes. We called a local branch who stated that our bill should have changed. We pointed out to him (as we both had to the main number people) that our taxes and fees were 20% of our bill, and we didn't think that was right. He agreed, and asked us to bring our bill in so he could look at it and see what's going on. Finally, someone's going to help us. We'll be going in to talk with him in the next day or two.

Meanwhile, our calls have been being dropped FREQUENTLY. Our bill actually stated that we weren't being "charged" for more than 30 dropped calls. RIDICULOUS!!! Our home phone doesn't work, our cell phones work randomly...Fidget's dad is sick and we have kids. We need a phone.

If there is a cloud in the sky, our tv doesn't work. Yesterday it was cloudy, and the tv went on strike. It rained and it lost it's signal completely.

If anyone reading this has any connection to a company such as Comcast or Charter (or anything similar), bring it to my area. Almost everyone who lives in my part of the world would switch if it was reliable and reasonably priced. You'd make a fortune from the commission.

There ends my rant. I have to go call the satellite people now. Wish me luck.

Another Rainy Day

2007-08-21T13:40:00.001-07:00

I knew it was going to rain today, my body told me. Fidget still thinks I'm half nuts when I look out the window and see a sunshine-y day and declare that it's going to rain. And we're both almost always amazed that I'm right. Crazy shit.

Greetings and Salutations

2007-08-11T09:34:00.000-07:00

I've been keeping unusually busy, although I can't for the life of me figure out what it is that I've been doing. I race around the house and around town all day, I'm exhausted at night, and I never seem to see an end to the chores that need doing.

Today is Saturday, it is laundry day. I LOVE doing laundry. I especially like it when I can hang the clothes on the line to dry. Alas, it's been too humid to do that the last couple of weeks, but fall is coming!

My goddaughter left for Navy boot camp this past Monday. I still can't believe how grown up she is. I'm going to try to write to her a couple of times a week, but I don't tend to be very good at pen and paper correspondence, never have been. Each time I write to her, I'll increase her rate. As in, the first letter (which I've already mailed) has her at SR (seaman recruit). The next letter will be SA (seaman apprentice), and up through all the ratings. TeeHee! Fidget's uncle did that to her brother when her brother was in Army boot camp, and for each rank that the letter was off, Fidget's bro had to do a bunch of sit-ups or push-ups. TEEHEE! She'll be kicking my ass when she gets home, but it will be something that she can giggle about later.

Number 1 (Fidget's oldest) has approached me about getting a cell phone. He's only 13, and in my opinion is too young for this. But I may have already shot myself in the foot on this one, because of what I told him when he started asking for one when he was 11. I told him that when he has a job and can pay the bill every month, we'd get him a cell phone. DOH! I didn't think he'd be working until he was 15 or 16. He's working for a pig farmer, and is actually being paid pretty well for it. What to do, what to do... I think it goes without saying that until his grades come up, it ain't happening. But I guess if his grades come up I don't have much of a choice, since I basically would be breaking my word if I didn't get him one. Sigh. There really should be a book about handling these things, because the kid finds the loophole every time.

Fidget's 20 year class reunion is this weekend. She and the boys are off to the reunion picnic, and she'll be attending the dinner tonight with her senior prom date. His name's David and he's gay, so as long as that's who she's dating, I have no problem with it. ;-)

Time to go switch loads. Until next time, dear readers...OH, I almost forgot! I caught a comic's show on Comedy Central that blew me away! He's hilarious. His name is Gabriel Iglesias (and that might be misspelled), and he is a HOOT!

Later, gators!

Bridge Collapse

2007-08-01T21:51:00.000-07:00

Thank you to all who have emailed or called. My family is a-ok.

For those who haven't heard, a major bridge collapsed. I'm guessing at this point if you do a search for bridge collapse, I-35, you will probably find the stories.

What makes me a proofreader/editor/etc.?

2007-07-24T06:48:00.000-07:00

After yesterday's post, I received several notes in my mail box and Dawn (the brave soul) commented below.

What makes me good at the above-listed? I can spell, for one. I excel at knowing where punctuation is SUPPOSED to be (as in, I'm one of those people who doesn't have to guess at where to put the comma and I know how and when to use a semi-colon). I recognize that the "grammar check" available in Word, Works, etc. isn't always correct, and I can recognize those instances. I have mastered the whole "maintaining a tense" that seems to be so troubling to people. I have a large vocabulary and can use it. What makes me even more effective with these particular books is the fact that I have a very strong grasp on the concepts and subject matter. And I love doing all of it.

I love taking our language apart and then putting it back together. I have had arguments over commas, over spacing, and over proper citation. This is what excites me. An auto-mechanic loves building, re-building, and fixing autos. I love doing this with the written text.

These, dear reader, are only a few of the reasons that I do what I do.

That said, this is my blog. It is more of a diary-type outlet. Things will be (and have been) misspelled, mis-punctuated, etc. Just because I sound like an illiterate idiot on my blog doesn't mean that I am. This is the one area of my life where I am not anal retentive. At least most of the time.

Phew! What a weekend!

2007-07-23T16:49:00.000-07:00

So...got this call last week from a friend of mine. He and a colleague of his had gotten a book published that was RIDDLED with errors. Well, to make a long story short, he wanted me to do the editing of the book before it's reprinted. Cool beans! A paid gig, and I was supposed to have until school starts back up next month. Suffice it to say, it didn't happen that way. The publishing house shall remain nameless, but they were being jerks. So...Bob (my friend) calls me up on Friday and says, "We have until Tuesday. Can you get anything done before then?" Well, shitfire.

I needed to have everything I could emailed to Bob today. I finished the whole damn book, and had it all to him yesterday! Yippee!! And it was no small task...a reasonably academic book, with HUNDREDS (probably close to a thousand) errors. Errors which any editor, publisher, or proofreader should have caught. Hell, about a third of them could have been found by simply using spellcheck. But I digress...(I just hate it when my friends get screwed).

I literally spent the entire weekend in front of my computer. I didn't spend time with Fidget or the kids, I didn't play with the dogs, I didn't even go with the family to Fidget's dad's birthday dinner yesterday. In 2 days I spent more than 30 hours sitting in front of the computer.

I am stiff. I am sore. And yes, dear reader, I am whiny. Well, it's tongue-in-cheek whining, but it's the kind of whining I do best.

And that's all the excitement in my world today.

The Skunk Story

2007-07-16T11:20:00.000-07:00

First of all, if you're going to get offended, stop reading here. There are things that happen while working in EMS that are humorous. That doesn't mean that those who are working take their jobs any less seriously. But there are things that happen that make the job very unique, and there are some things that may not be humorous in every day life, but are very funny when they happen on the job. Here is one story.

It was about midnight. Fidget and I were in our kitchen, drinking coffee and visiting with a couple of friends. The pager went off, indicating we needed to do an ALS (Advanced Life Support) transfer of a patient to a nearby facility. This was fairly routine, and since I was on-call I jumped in my truck and headed to the ambulance garage about 3 minutes away. En route, my medic called my cell phone to let me know that he was already in the ER with the patient and that I should grab the rig and head over right away. Got the rig, went to the hospital (across the street from the ambulance garage) and drug the cot and equipment into the ER.

Before I could even get the patient onto our cardiac monitor, the medic tells me that I am to do a stat (immediate) ABG (arterial blood gas) draw and run it. (I also worked in the cardiopulmonary department of the hospital, so my job with this patient was 2-fold.) I did my quick respiratory assessment of the patient and found him to be in severe respiratory distress.

After getting my equipment, I do the ABG's and find numbers at the "alarm" level. No surprise, but it gives the docs (both at the home hospital and the receiving hospital) a baseline. We load and go, and head out Code 3 (lights and sirens). The patient's wife is riding shotgun.

The medic had called in an extra EMT to assist him in the back, as our patient was a code waiting to happen. Just as we were leaving town for the receiving hospital (about 40 miles away), medic tells me to step on it. So we're hauling ass. Coming from a small town in the middle of nowhere, there was no traffic, so this wasn't a challenge.

My medic tells me to hold it steady. I know he's intubating (inserting a breathing tube in order to breathe for the patient) but doesn't want to alarm the patient's wife by saying that. As we're doing 75-80 mph, I see it. The timing couldn't be worse. I can't swerve, because to do so at that speed could injure the patient as well as the crew in the back. I can't slam on the brakes for the same reason. I say a quick, silent prayer and gently guide the rig in what I hope is a direction that will miss the skunk.

I hold my breath. I tentatively sniff the air a few times. Phew! Must have missed it. The patient's wife actually says, "Boy, that was close." You're not kidding. And then I hear something from the back of the rig.

"RETCH...GAG...RETCH...!!!" It's the EMT. "Oh...RETCH...My...GAG...God...RETCH...What the hell...GAG...is that?!"

I can't help it, I giggle. So does the patient's wife. The EMT is almost throwing up. I think she's messing with me, because I don't smell anything. Then the medic voices his unhappiness, "Did you hit a SKUNK?!" "Well, sort of, I think."
EMT: "Well, don't think anymore. You did. Oh God, it's awful."
Wife: "Oh, no. Now I smell it. I guess we didn't miss it after all."
RETCH...GAG...from the back.

And it was terrible. I must have hit it square. The only good news at this point is that our patient is blissfully unaware of our circumstance.

We arrive at the receiving facility, and we're met by one of their medics. Who immediately starts gagging. "Oh, God, you guys STINK!! Did you hit a skunk?" "Um...yeah." The security guard props the door open with his chair and heads for the men's room. It was bad.

As we're leaving, I'm given a new nickname (which stuck for almost 6 months) by their medic, "Stinky."

We scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed. We soaked it in tomato juice. And scrubbed some more. The smell weakened, but we couldn't get rid of it. The next day, I went back to wash the rig again: And the entire ambulance garage REEKED. I opened all 3 bay doors, turned on fans in the office, hosed everything down. It took about 2 weeks for the smell to go completely away.

And that, dear readers, is the skunk story.

I Am an Idiot

2007-07-09T14:32:00.000-07:00

Okay. So, I was going to post today with some lovely pictures of our rats...er dogs. I cannot get the damn pictures off the camera and onto the computer. Sigh. The really sad part of this, is that I've done it before. I have a theory.

It was explained to me recently that a person with a bachelor's degree will generally have a higher IQ score than someone with a master's. A person with a master's will have a higher score than someone with a phd. Therefore, school must make a person dumber.

Since I have been attending college since the last time I put pictures on the computer, apparently my education is doing exactly what it's supposed to do: it's making me an idiot.

Update on the List of 8

2007-07-05T18:50:00.000-07:00

Because I've had several readers send me emails/comments about some of the items on my list, I thought I would go ahead and address them here:

1. Anonymous and everyone else: I am more than happy to share how I lost the weight.
There are some products that I'm taking (non-prescription) that have helped me. I won't share exactly what they are here, as they are not necessarily made for weight loss and I don't want anyone saying I'm pretending to be a doctor/health guru. That said, if you're interested in what they are simply send me an email (I think it's find-able if you click to look at my profile, otherwise it's qatoblog a t gmail.com) and I will email you back. You can still do this anonymously by going to a free email site and signing up for a free email account. Just make sure you put qato or something like that in the subject line.
Mostly what I'm doing is eating less and moving more. I walk as much as I can, and help some friends out on their farm as much as possible. I try to pay attention to what I eat (keeping a food journal helps lots of people, but I can't ever seem to keep one for more than a couple of days no matter how well I'm doing). I don't really deny myself anything, but when I want a brownie I only have a bite or two as opposed to the whole thing.

2. Yes, I will share the skunk vs. ambulance story. Look for it coming up.

3. Yes, I am willing to share pictures of our dogs after their most recent haircut. I just have to figure out how to hook the camera up to the computer and get the picture on the blog. Shouldn't take me more than 6 or 8 months, tops. (Seriously, I'll try to figure it out this weekend.)

4. Yes, I used to use drugs. Lots of them. Frequently. I no longer partake in "better living through chemistry." The only drugs I take are ones that are prescribed, and only when it is absolutely necessary.

I think that about covers it.

Yikes! I've Been Tagged!

2007-07-03T10:16:00.001-07:00

I've been tagged by Chari and am now compelled to provide, in no particular order, eight random facts/habits about myself that you may or may not know [or even care]. However, the rules dictate that I provide the rules first:

1. We have to post these rules before we give you the facts.
2. Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them each a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

So, here are 8 random facts about me:
1. FACT: I can wiggle my eyebrows, and I enjoy doing so because inevitably whomever sees me do this tries to do it. They are never successful.
2. FACT: I have lost 70 pounds so far. Despite the fact that I'm still a fat ass, I'm much happier with the way I look. I actually found a couple of muscles the other day. The woman they belonged to didn't necessarily appreciate me finding them, but has agreed not to press charges so long as I abide by the restraining order.
3. FACT: Despite the fact that I'm not very good at it, I derive a sense of accomplishment from trimming our dogs. After their most recent hair cut, we have removed all mirrors from the house and will be getting them therapy lest the ASPCA come back to inquire about the large rats again.
4. HABIT: I am anal-retentive about shirt collars. They must be folded and lined up correctly. People around me who don't share my retentiveness don't always appreciate my help. Especially Fidget.
5. FACT: The one and only time anyone actually called the police on me, it was for mowing their lawn. Okay, it was the early 90's, I was using meth and had apparently decided that everyone on my side of the street needed their lawns mowed. The fact that I had been mowing for 13 hours had nothing to do with the call to the police, I'm sure. Nor the fact that I hadn't bothered to actually ask anyone if they WANTED me to mow their lawn. Oops.
6. FACT: I was never a Girl Scout. I got kicked out the Brownies for kissing another little girl. Hey, she drug me into the closet! When I did stand-up (one fun summer) I used to say that I got kicked out of Girl Scouts for eating a Brownie.
7. FACT: I ran over a skunk with an ambulance at about 80 miles an hour.
8. FACT: I've taught two of my cats to play fetch. Okay...they're cats. Most likely, they trained me to throw the toy.

So, now I'm supposed to tag 8 other people. Hmmm...Do I know 8 people? A sad realization has come to me...I'm a loser with no blogging pals. I'll tag as many as I can, forgive me for bending the rules:

Dawn
Cranky Chick
MJ--Damn, I don't know her but was going to tag her anyway. Looks like she's already been tagged.
Karen

Now, if I can just manage to get these 3 tagged, it looks like I'm done. Thanks, Chari!

Disclaimer: If for some reason you wanted to be tagged and weren't, please contact the blog author and a tag will be sent. Equal Opportunity Tagger.

Another Reader Question

2007-06-22T16:36:00.000-07:00

Q: What's keeping you busy these days, you aren't blogging like you used to?

A: Well, I'm doing a number of things. And a whole lot of running in between.

First, I'm copy-editing a book for a friend of mine. It's a great book, and when he finds the right publisher I will definitely be putting all kinds of info on my blog about it. I love doing this, and it's a great book. I feel very strongly that every person 18 and over in our country should read it before they're allowed to vote. Even if you don't agree with the politics in the book, it causes the reader to think about their decision to vote for one candidate/party versus another. The book encourages Americans to take control of our country back.

I'm also chasing Fidget's kids this summer. Between baseball and their other activities, it's practically a full time job. Add to that Fidget's chaotic work schedule and figuring out when to have meals ready each day can be a trial of trigonometric proportions. Plus all the rest of the every day household stuff: cleaning, laundry, etc.

I'm also doing some outdoor work on a friend's hobby farm. Mostly mowing the lawn, tearing down pens (they used to breed Siberian Huskies, and we're getting rid of the pens since they don't do that anymore), and stuff like that. It's getting me back into shape and it's something that I enjoy.

I'm also still working with Young Living oils. My business is slowly growing, which is fine by me as I didn't get involved with it to build a business--it's just something that's happening along the way. The oils have been life-changing for me, and are something I remain passionate about.

So, in a nutshell, that's what I've been up to.

Question of the Week

2007-06-12T20:37:00.000-07:00

First, let me thank my readers. There are WAY more of you than I ever imagined! Kinda cool, kinda scary, pretty awesome! In any case, despite SOME of you (ahem! you know who you are!) giving me some well-deserved shit over losing "the list", you all came through. I'm going to try to answer them in the order received, but...you all know how I am. Keep the questions coming, I'll keep them all (in my online account, so even if my hard drive goes, I'll still have it this time). :-)

Question: "As this is pride month, is your family 'out' at the kids' school?" (Secondary question: "How did you and your partner come out?")

Answer: Well...The short answer to the first question is yes.

The longer, more entailed answer is this:
When Fidget and her ex-husband divorced, we decided to let him have the kids during the school year (we get them every other weekend or so, depending on Fidget's schedule, as well as during school breaks) and have them with us over the summer (with her ex getting them every other weekend or so). The main reason for this was to limit the amount of upheaval they would have to go through, and later decided to continue the arrangement because her ex lives in a much better school district than we do.

I'm going to make a long story short, in order to keep things focused on the questions asked.

Fidget decided she wanted out of her marriage. She came out to her husband, thinking...okay, I honestly don't know what she was thinking. Big to-do ensued, he got carted off to jail for threats and acting out and such (his brother bailed him out the same night). They tried to live together while they worked out the details of the divorce, but he was being a total and complete asshole. As in, he emailed everyone in their address book about her "coming out". Yeah, nice. In any case, she's out to everyone.

As for me? I had lived in a few other states, and had a sort of girlfriend in one that I had recently moved from. I came home to take care of my parents because their health was failing. When my ex decided she wanted to re-locate to where I was, I decided to come out because: 1. I didn't want her to have to go back in the closet after 20 years of being out and 2. I didn't want to go back in the closet myself, as I had been out when I moved away.

I decided to tell my dad first, because I figured that if he accepted me no one else's reaction would matter as much; and if he didn't accept me no one's else's reaction would matter as much.

My dad's dad was a pentecostal minister: snakes, healings, the whole nine yards. My dad didn't keep with that religion, but was a devout Lutheran. He was strict, and generally non-tolerant of "faggots". Needless to say, I didn't expect acceptance.

I waited until I had about 20 minutes until I needed to leave for work. And I went out to the garage, where he spent a lot of time fixing things, woodworking, etc. And I said, "Dad, I need to tell you something. This isn't easy for me to say, and it's probably not going to be easy for you to hear. I'm gay." My dad blinked a few times. And then he said, "Well, you were born that way. I'm glad you told me, but it's nothing to be ashamed of."

Most of my co-workers at the time had already figured it out, and when I told my shift supervisor that night what had taken place he said, "Well, I guess everyone else can quit pretending they don't know, huh?" :-)

My dad's the only person I "came out" to. I mean, I didn't formally approach anyone else with the intention of telling them. Everyone else had either already figured it out, or did so by my references to my "partner". I never made (and still don't) a big deal out of it, and I've found that if I don't, no one else does (at least for the most part).

So we are both totally and completely out.

The story above might have made more chronological sense without my editing, but I took out a whole bunch of extraneous information, and tried to keep the info pertinent to my response to the questions.

Where the Hell Have I Been?

2007-06-11T16:11:00.000-07:00

I'm still here. Too frickin' busy to blog, I guess. Well, that's sounds good anyway.

Fidget's dad has started chemo, and what a roller coaster that's been. He's generally doing well, but he went through several days of being basically non-responsive, so that was scary. Thank heavens that's over. At least for now.

The two youngest of Fidget's boys are here for the summer. The oldest will join us for a week or so later in the summer. Between his baseball team and his job, he's keeping busy. God, they grow up so fast. Anyway, I'll be keeping busy trying to keep the other two's schedules straight. They both play baseball (different teams), and they both have about a bazillion activities to keep me...um...I mean THEM, harried...er...intellectually stimulated.

I've gotten a few hundred (okay, so more like 7) emails asking me to answer some questions from my previous blog. Well, I would do that. Except I lost the damn list. (Collective groan.) I know. I think it was on my old hard drive and it got erased. That or the Martians came and took it. So...here's the deal:

You ask, I answer. Nothing is off limits, but please keep in mind that I won't disclose any identities, or give away too much that will personally identify me. Deal with it, because until Fidget's kids are all growed up that's the way it's going to be. And don't worry, I won't disclose your identity either.

Hot topics from the "previous blog" included: EMS, LGBT stuff, religion, politics, life with kids, addictions, and many other tantalizing subjects. Remember, if you ask and you don't like my response--tough. Like you (and everyone else) I have opinions--they are just that, opinions. I don't expect anyone's life to change because of what I think about any particular topic. I'm not here to convince anyone of anything. I say this, because it is the "spammers" who repeatedly bombarded my email and blog with crap who caused me to shut down the last blog.

I'll try to answer at least one question a week (after all, the blog is entitled "QATO").

Okay readers, it's your turn. Get your questions to me: email, comment, call, snail mail, UPS, FedEx; hell, you can even lean over my deck and ask me that way.

Brownie points to anyone who remembers what QATO stands for. (And yes, smart ass, I do remember. I'm forgetful, not senile.)

DONE!!!

2007-05-11T12:58:00.000-07:00

I just finished taking my last final of the semester. Thank God that's over!

Fidget's dad is doing pretty well. He's still in the hospital, and we go to see them as often as we can. Her mom has been staying with him this whole time. She went home one night to get some more clothes (when they found out he was going to be in longer than originally thought), but has otherwise not left his side.

It's pretty spectacular to see their love in action.

I wish we all would have a love like that. (And I thank God every day that I do.)

Fidget's Dad

2007-04-20T21:11:00.000-07:00

It's been a hectic few days. We just found out on Wednesday night that Fidget's dad has a tumor on his brain. His full body scan didn't reveal any other sites, so it seems he falls in the 1% category of people who's primary site is in the brain.

Prayers, positives thoughts, happy vibes welcome.

Why is Everything a Fucking Competition?

2007-04-18T05:53:00.000-07:00

If you have pain--your friend, professor, uncle, whoever will attempt to tell you how much more pain they have.

If you're good at a subject--a classmate, friend, professor, etc. will find a way to communicate the message that they're better.

If you try to do a good deed for someone--they will find a way to show you that no good deed goes unpunished.

(This list could potentially go on forever, but I will assume that my dear reader has gotten the idea.)

Why is everything a fucking competition?

Why can't we simply be happy for one another, compassionate towards each other, and grateful for what we have? It's really so simple!

One-ups-manship doesn't help anyone, and it hurts everyone.

Try it for a day. Go out of your way to say "Thank you" to someone who's done something nice for you--it needn't be extravagant, a phone call with your voice connecting with their voice (not a damn machine) saying "Thank you". When someone tells you that they're leg is broken, don't let your first response be: "Oh, I remember when MY leg was broken..." Pull your head out of your ass and allow yourself and them to focus the moment on them. Maybe later you can commiserate with them about broken bones, but let them have their moment. Third, be grateful for what you do have: no matter what it is, find a way to be grateful for it.

I do pretty well with thanking others, and I try to focus my responses on the compassionate, it's the gratitude for things that sometimes gets me. When my electric bill is sky high (a topic for another post), I try to be grateful for electricity in my home and for having it available. Doesn't always happen before I get pissy and run around the house unplugging appliances, but the key here is PROGRESS, NOT PERFECTION.

Just my .02 for the day.

Boring Update

2007-04-09T08:09:00.000-07:00

We had Fidget's brother and sister-in-law over last evening. Tried to grill burgers, but the wind was just too much and we ended up broiling them. Had a great time, they are such wonderful people. A perk of moving is that we'll be living closer to them, so will hopefully get to see them more often than we do.

I am padding around the house in my pj's and robe today. It seems I caught some kind of a tummy bug. ICK! Came on last night, but I'm feeling a little better this morning. Will try some crackers later.

In school news, I'm working on about a bazillion different things. We're closing in on the end of the semester, so all the profs have to get their last minute exams in before finals...in addition to the projects and papers and such.

Fidget's still loving her new job. There was some family drama for her yesterday, created by her mother. Fidget tries to blame herself for her mother's actions/emotions, but is realizing that she is not responsible for her mother's anything. Good for Fidget!

Medications and Life

2007-04-02T12:37:00.000-07:00

So I've been struggling with major pain issues for a few months now. Some pain is due to old injuries, some is due to arthritis. So I went to a new doctor (because my "usual" doc moved away last year, and I hadn't bothered to find a new one. He's someone Fidget has worked with, knows and trusts. He was very nice. He gave me a new three pill cocktail that I take several times a day. (Well, 1 I take twice a day, 1 I take once a day, the other I take 3-4 times/day). It does take care of my pain.

It makes me a nonsensical fucking zombie. I have 2 evening classes (with the same professor), that I was having trouble attending because I couldn't sit for 3 hours (and walking during breaks only made it worse...trust me, I tried everything. I even stuffed pillows in my sweats one night, thinking it would help my hip pain...no go). I let my professor (he prefers to be called "teacher" because it makes him seem more approachable and less scary) know, and he has been wonderful. He's letting me do one of the classes completely in a different format...Fabulous. I can't tell you the pressure that took off. The other class...he's getting the notes for me from another student so that I can still take the tests and keep up with the class that way. He's a godsend. (He probably needs a name here...um...I'll call him MentorMan.)

My problem is that I have so much respect for him that I value his opinion of me. I worry that he'll think I'm a slacker, or am trying to slough off on my homework, which is definitely not the case. If I had known that 3 hour classes would kill me, I wouldn't have signed up for them. Now I know, so I won't do it again. I try to show that I'm honest and accountable. I try to excel in any work that pertains to his classes. I try to do "extra" research and reading, so that I'm on top of what's going on in class. I email him regularly.

Part of me is honestly ready to just say fuck it. Finish the semester and quit school. I'm surrounded by people who care, who tell me this would be the worst thing I could do. I'm torn.

Part of the problem is that one of my majors (I have two) is one that I don't think is a good fit...Justice Administration. It's nothing like what I imagined it would be, and I can't see how I will use most of it in the future. But...if I drop JuAd as a major, then I lose MentorMan as my adviser...and god knows who I'd end up with then.

What I really want are degrees in literature and secondary ed. I would love to teach high school English. Or work with books, at least. Next semester I'm taking a few lit courses to "try it out".

I'm feeling like I did before I got clean...I was an addict for a number of years. The problem is that, without insurance, I can't afford the expensive meds and the labs that come with them, so the types of drugs that I'm taking now are pretty much the only alternative to pain.

My doc suggested only taking classes/working during the "good" times of my day...That leaves me trying to cram everything in between 8am and 4pm. He has told me that he can change my med (I think there's one in particular that's making me zone), but that it's the lesser of the available evils. I have a drawer full of narcotics...vicodin, oxy, vistaril, xanax...you name it, I've got it. I don't like to take them because they make me "not me". (Actually, the vistaril is left over from an allergic reaction I had last fall.)

I'm trying anything and everything that's being suggested to me, that sounds at all reasonable. I'm using therapeutic grade oils, dietary supplements (vitamins and such), not eating white bread, not drinking caffeine, etc.

I can't remember much that happens after about 6 or so in the evening. Apparently, I'm witty and coherent...I just can't remember it.

I can't go off the meds, because the pain is to the point of being unbearable (and I have a very high pain tolerance). Anyone out there have any other suggestions? Feel free to email or comment below.

Looking for Ideas...

2007-03-31T18:41:00.000-07:00

Fidget and I will celebrate our 5 year anniversary in September. I'm looking for frugal ideas (yes, I would love to take her on a cruise...or fly her to the tropics...but that's a little too extravagant for my budget). I thought about having an "all about Fidget" party, and inviting our closest friends, family, paid strangers who are nice to us, etc. and celebrating all of the reasons that I love her throughout the night. I've got half a cow and about a dozen chickens in my freezer, so I could fire up the grill, buy some beverages and have a shin-dig.

I am an incredible romantic at heart...and if I don't plan something, I will end up spending a bazillion dollars on roses (because she loves them that much). I will probably send 5 dozen roses
to her at work, regardless of whatever else is planned. It's the least I can do...She's put up with me for all these years, after all.

Ever get something stuck in your head?

2007-03-30T20:34:00.000-07:00

I don't mean a song...I mean a memory. Something you'd rather not think about. Something you almost wish you could just erase...except that you wouldn't really go through with erasing it because to do so would alter who you are. I mean, it would alter you to your core.

I'm being haunted by an EMS memory, an ambulance run I was on about 3 years ago. When the pager went off, I had no idea that my life was about to be changed. And it's stuck in my head. I dream about it, it comes into my mind at the most odd times...and it won't go away. It's like my brain is stuck. And I can't figure out why.

I'm not in touch with the local crew anymore, so I can't ask them for advice. I don't know that a non-EMS person would understand. I just keep thinking that if I could figure out why it's stuck there, I could un-stick it.

Suggestions anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

A Question For Readers

2007-03-28T21:31:00.000-07:00

I'm working on a major project thing for one of my classes (Rehabilitation and Prevention). I'll tell you more about it in another post, another day.

My question for you, dear reader, is this: A known sex offender (registered or not) moves in next door to you. What do you do? Does your action/reaction change if you have children?

The more responses I get, the better. I will not quote you (unless I specifically ask for and receive your permission), nor will I disclose any identities (even if I have permission to quote you). No worries. This is solely for my information, to better write up my project. I will let you know in the future (also protecting respondents anonymity) what the responses were. I want totally honest responses.

Please comment below or email me. I GREATLY appreciate your help.

Rant

2007-03-27T09:33:00.000-07:00

We've been scurrying around, having our house shown. Did you know that the house has to be PERFECT if one is to consider buying? Fidget and I had no idea...Here we thought that painting and things were the job of the buyer. Apparently, if you don't like the paint color that's in the living room then that's reason to not buy the house. Ridiculous, it's completely ridiculous.

When Fidget and I look at a house we ignore things like: the colors on the walls, any smell that we can get rid of (yes, that includes the heavy smoke and stale beer smells that have been in a couple of the houses we've looked at), the flooring, things like that. We feel that those are personal choices...some may sweeten the deal (hardwood floors) but they are not deal breakers--those are things we can fix/change.

Fidget and I both smoke. If it's freezing cold (like below zero) or raining, we smoke in the house. If we have guests over who also smoke, we smoke in the house (this is rare). If all of the windows are open on a nice day, we smoke in the house. The rest of the time, we smoke outside. Most of the time when we're smoking indoors, we're smoking in front of a window fan that's set to vent to the outside. Are there times when a non-smoker can smell the smoke? Of course. Is it ever heavy? Never. Our house is almost always spotless...well, relatively. We have cats, and where there are cats, there is cat hair. (We get rid of as much as we can before showing the house...using sticky-rollers on furniture and drapes and such.) We have non-smoking friends who have told us that our house doesn't stink at all.

That said: I view a smoky odor as a "fixable" issue. If there is a bad aroma in a house I'm otherwise interested in (and trust me, in the last couple of months we've gone into some NASTY houses), it's not a deal-breaker. I can fix it. I understand that there are a few people out there with a severe allergy to smoke...I'm not talking about them.

The people I'm talking about: Well, one lady wouldn't even look at the house because there was the faint odor of smoke. (I had smoked OUTSIDE, just before we left so the Realtor could show the house, my guess is that she smelled it outside.) Ridiculous.

I know I should quit smoking, and I want to quit. I can't do the gum (dentures); the lozenges upset my stomach; I'm allergic to the adhesive in the patch; I can't afford the medication. So I'm going to have to quit cold turkey. In the meantime, this is my home. This is where I live, where I need to be comfortable. One's home is their refuge from the world. I refuse to feel guilty about being comfortable in my own home.

When I go to a non-smoker's home, I would never in a million years dream of lighting up. To me, that's the equivalent of peeing on someone's table. They don't smoke, and they probably think it's a filthy, disgusting habit/addiction. And it is.

But in my own home, I will do as I please. If you make an offer on my home for MORE than the asking price with the stipulation that I not smoke in it until you move in...It's a deal. Until then, I have to live here. You are the guest.

This pisses me off to no end. Am I being unreasonable? Please email or comment below with your thoughts on the issue.

Spring Break

2007-03-09T17:13:00.000-08:00

So next week is Spring Break, and it seems that every class I went to this week was full of students who had exciting destinations. Me? I'll be home, writing papers, studying for an exam that scheduled for the MONDAY WE COME BACK (even I think that sucks), and doing other miscellaneous homework.

I keep trying to figure out when exactly I became a responsible student.

In other news, we've had a few more people come and look at the house, so hopefully it will sell before summer.

Snow, Snow, and More Snow

2007-03-01T12:20:00.000-08:00

Last week's snowstorm left us with about 14 inches...in 2 days. Yesterday we got about 2-3 inches. Today, I would guesstimate that we've gotten about 7 so far. The worst is supposed to hit tonight. They are predicting that between today and tomorrow we'll receive another 14-18 inches. All of the roads into and out of my town are closed.

Fidget is stuck in a town about 30 miles south of where we live, she's staying at her parents' house. I'm glad she's safe and warm, and able to get to her new job so she doesn't fall behind in "training/orientation" but I miss her. She left yesterday morning...and she probably won't be able to come home until Saturday.

As if this wasn't enough...My damn snowblower won't start. Rheumatoid prevents me from shoveling...I did about half of our deck, and will probably pay for that for several days. I'm having to rely on neighbors to help me with snow removal--I'm glad I have nice neighbors, but I HATE having others do something for me that I'm capable of doing myself. I had the next door neighbor over to look at the snowblower, but he couldn't get it running either. RATS!

We are lucky, though. So far (knocking on wood) we haven't lost power. Which is a good thing, because all the generators in town are already sold out. I'm heading out to the garage to see if we have an old metal coffee can. I'll keep some candles and a lighter with it, that way if the power goes out I will still have a source of heat.

Sometimes I really hate winter.

Decisions...

2007-02-23T12:29:00.000-08:00

My EMT re-registration is due by the end of March. This means I either need to take an NREMT (National Registry of Emergency Medical Technicians) approved refresher course, or I let my registration expire.

The decision is one that I have been pondering for quite a few months. I will not be re-registering. If, in the future, I decide to start riding on ambulances again I will simply need to take the course over. I've made this decision based on a number of things, 2 of which are:

1. I don't really have time right now to commit to an ambulance service. I know that if I were to become involved again it would over-ride everything else in my life and...well, I just don't have that kind of time.
2. This is a terrifically judgmental statement, but: I'm not sure I like what I see/hear about the caliber of some of the squads in my area. There doesn't seem to be any middle ground between the "load and go" squads and the "even if they're dead we can bring 'em back" squads. One squad in particular, which I have always respected, really saddens me. It's become all about heroics and bravado...oh, and politics.

But I digress...The bottom line is, I can't take part in a profession that I've lost respect for. And that makes me more sad than any other part of it...the loss of respect.

Yes, it makes me very sad.

Note: I've edited this post about a hundred times. If it seems vague or nonsensical, that's why. I refuse to discuss specific situations that are upsetting to me in a public forum. Several people have emailed me and asked me about my decision, and I will let this post answer your question.

Yes, I still love EMS. No, this doesn't mean I'll never go back to it. But yes, this does mean that you will not be changing my mind about it any time soon. I thank you all for your concern. I'm okay about my decision. Really.

So I keep waiting for something exciting to happen...

2007-02-22T09:12:00.000-08:00

You know, something "blogworthy". I keep thinking that SOMEthing will occur...anything, really. (Can you hear the crickets chirping? If so, clean your basement, because things are so dull here, even the crickets apparently go south for the winter.)

I did get an A on our first statistics test. That's something. But not something so exciting that I can create a whole post about it. So...without further ado, here is the exciting news:

I have Spring allergies. The battle began on Tuesday, when I noticed the sniffles. Yesterday morning, I couldn't hear or breathe through my nose (hmm...depending on how you read that sentence it might sound like I can normally hear through my nose...fuck it, let 'em wonder). Today my entire sinus cavity is threatening to explode. I am ditching class and am going to stay home and blow my nose. Doesn't that sound exciting? Thrilling even?

Oh, come on! That's about as exciting as it gets around here...

Happy Groundhog's Day! Phil Didn't See His Shadow!!

2007-02-02T12:54:00.000-08:00

Well, it's colder than crap here in Minnesota. We've been having wind chills of 30 below almost daily. I was bragging about the mild winter, and this is me being told to "shut up" by Mother Nature. Apparently a PMS week for her.

In other news...I almost got a new watch battery. Now, you may wonder why a watch battery qualifies as exciting enough to blog about. I've been asking for a new battery for my watch since last August. Anniversary present, Christmas present, Birthday present...Just- because-I-remembered-to-bring-the-damn-watch-to-Walmart present. Fidget was excited as we entered Wally World to purchase kitty food--TA-DA! It was the wrong damn watch. It was a watch I haven't seen in a few years. We have no idea where my favorite watch is. (Favorite because it has a complete leather band, even behind the watch face, and I'm allergic to metal--so I don't break out from my "favorite" watch.) Damn.

Influenza A is making the rounds here, the local school had 55 kids out with it yesterday. How about where you are?

Things are getting crazy already...

2007-01-26T16:03:00.000-08:00

My schedule is completely insane this semester. Half the time I'm not sure if I'm coming or going. I'm not taking the Law Enforcement class this semester, I substituted in an American Women's History class instead.

I averaged out the amount of reading I'll be doing, and it came out to just under 500 pages per week. 13 books in about 15 or 16 weeks. Insanity!

I'm going to set a goal of one blog post per week, hopefully I can maintain it.

We're still trying to sell the house, but our market lacks something--buyers. No one is buying right now, so patience is on the menu. Luckily (or unluckily, as the case may be) I'm too busy to notice time passing by.

Fidget will be starting new job soon...At the hospital in the city where we hope to move to.

That's all the more update there is!

Back to School

2007-01-18T14:33:00.000-08:00

I'm taking only 12 credits this semester because one of them is Statistics. My advisor recommended I do it this way and I am accepting his advice.

Stats promises to be challenging. I've taken it before, but my grade wasn't high enough. Worked my ass off, too, so this class makes me nervous.

Law Enforcement and Society might be interesting. Our professor is a former assistant county attorney. She teaches for the first 1.5 hours and then law enforcement officers teach the next 1.5 hours each week. Sounds like there will be tons of homework, and we had our first quiz the first night of class.

Rehab and Prevention and Juvenile Justice are the other two classes. One of my favorite professors teaches both of them, and I enjoy his teaching style so I am hopeful that they will be interesting. I haven't had either of these yet so we'll see.

My schedule is pretty screwy this semester, and I will be glad when it's over. I have morning classes and night classes. Yuck! That puts me driving the 30 miles to school twice a day several days a week. I can kill some time, but not 7 hours. No matter what I did, I just couldn't get my schedule to come out decently.

Fidget is giving her notice today. She's accepted a job in the same city where I'm going to school and where we hope to land if/when our house sells. As long as we're both driving to and from school/work we won't be seeing much of each other, so I have even more reason to hope the house sells sooner rather than later.

That's the news from this side of the river.

Firefox and Houses

2007-01-06T20:04:00.000-08:00

As I mentioned in a recent post, I downloaded Mozilla Firefox. And I really like it. IE kept crashing on me (especially after I had downloaded their "latest and greatest"). It's user friendly and seems solid. Keep in mind that I'm not a computer guru so this is purely a user-based opinion. I especially like the fact that I can once again log into blogger. I still don't know why IE wouldn't let me in, but I don't care anymore.

On Monday Fidget and I and our Realtor are doing a day-long marathon. I think there are 20 houses to look at--plus an entirely separate list of about 25 more for a different day. Merrie, our Realtor, called this morning with bad news--the house that I really like (from picture and internet description) is a foreclosure home and the cleaning people haven't been in yet--so we won't be able to see it on Monday.

I'm really trying to be patient with this process. More than anything I want our house sold. We can always rent a storage unit for our belongings and rent a room (we have a small "motel" in town with weekly rates). It wouldn't be luxurious by any stretch, but at least then we could move on a house when we find one we like. We did have someone else come last week and look at our house--Loved the floors, loved our basement (my dad was quite a woodworker and built some solid shelving for storage and it's partially finished) but didn't like the kitchen layout or the stove. (Not the actual stove, we have a counter-top stove with an oven in the cabinetry across the kitchen, next to the fridge.) Bummer. Fidget had called a lady from her church who's looking for a 4-bedroom home so we're hoping it wasn't her family that came to look--because at least that means there's one more hope out there.

We're not asking too much for the house--our asking price is about $9000 more than our tax valuation for 2007. We've fixed everything before it broke. We put in new flooring in 2006. We bought expensive window coverings this fall. We still have to paint the damned living room white, but other than that it's a great house. It's just in the wrong town for us. Hell, I even looked into the cost of buying some land and moving the house--but that is totally cost prohibitive.

All my life I've hated limbo. I'm one of those people who feel better AFTER I make the decision. I can deal with success or failure, but I hate riding the fence. Right now I feel like I'm sitting on a barbed wire fence. I'm not someone who can happily sit and wait, I'm a woman of action. I want to be pro-actively doing SOMEthing, and in this situation there's nothing I can do. I can't even paint my damn living room because our furniture is large and heavy and so I need to wait for Fidget to be around to help me move it. Sigh.

It is fun looking at the different properties, and I'm trying to make it all about the fun. Our house has only been on the market for about 6 weeks or so (through the Holidays)...Can you imagine how edgy I'll be in 6 more weeks? UGH!

House Hunting

2006-12-30T13:09:00.000-08:00

Fidget and I went and looked at 3 hobby farms yesterday. The last one that we looked at wasn't too bad, but it was about 50 yards from the nearest turkey barn...and it smelled bad. And if it smells bad on a 30 degree day in December, it will be unbearable with a little humidity and/or heat. Needless to say, that one's not for us. The second one we looked at was nice. The house had sort of an odd layout: there's only one bathroom and it's on the mainfloor. Which might be okay...except the laundry room and office/5 th bedroom was on one side of the bathroom and the rest of the house was on the other. That house also featured something I'd never seen before, and something I called the "Jeffrey Dahmer option". It had a room on the second floor with a bathtub in it; the bathtub is not connected to any plumbing, nor is there a commode or a sink in the room. It's literally a room with a claw-foot bathtub in it...with a drain that goes outside, through the wall. Hence my nickname for it. The house was okay, but just didn't feel like it was solid. The first site we looked at was great. The house needs lots of work, but the structure is solid and the price reflects the work it needs. Had a great barn, okay garage, wonderful other building, and a few tin buildings that we would probably tear down. Property needs to be baled, but would be exactly what we're looking for. Except the driveway. The driveway is just over 1/2 mile long, curvy and muddy. It would take $2000-3000 worth of gravel and work just to fix the driveway--and then there's the matter of snow removal in the winter. If it weren't for the driveway, it would be a serious consideration. The well is good, the septic needs work, but the owner is willing to pay half to update that. Damn driveway.

Those were pretty much the only hobby farms near our price range and in the area we're looking at. So, we expanded our area and decided that if we could find a house we loved that there are a few towns nearby we might consider living in.

The market here is ridiculous. The city where I attend school is about 30 miles south of us, and that's where the majority of Fidget's family live so we had initially thought we'd move there. The prices are a joke! If I wanted to spend that kind of money, I would buy a house in the Twin Cities or Denver...where they actually have a job market/economy to support the prices. The little town we live in is the same. It's insanity.

We're hoping the outlook improves in the next month or so. We are selling a turn-key home. We are (at the suggestion of our realtor) painting the halls and living room white. We are doing this even though we just finished faux painting last summer. The houses we have looked at (about 15 so far) have had walls that were hot pink, electric blue, green, black, red...NONE of them have had white walls--or any other neutral shade for that matter. We just got new flooring (linoleum in the bathroom and kitchen/dining and laminate throughout the rest) in the entire main floor of our house. The houses we've looked at all look like they're straight out of the 70's with filthy shag carpeting, gummy old linoleum and the like. And I'm not talking about the "fixer upper" that we looked at!

One place we want to look at, and people will think we're nuts (maybe we are) is an old schoolhouse that's been pseudo-converted into a house. It's tens of thousands below our price range, it's sitting on a few acres, and the area isn't too far from where we want to be. It could be a fun project--but it could also be a pain in the rear.

That's all for now--for those of you in my area, please keep your eyes peeled for hobby farms for us.

Blogging Trouble

2006-12-23T15:39:00.000-08:00

So, I may have made a mistake. I don't even pretend to know much about blogging and blog pages and such...but after seeing the ad to update my blogger account, I pushed the "okay" button. And now I have been unable to log in to blogger. Ack! I actually have time right now to be blogging, and I can't get in! So I sent a message to the blogger-helpers, but they have yet to respond. Yes, that's correct, after me spending almost an hour looking all over their site for a way to contact them for assistance without having to access my account, finding it and pleasantly writing the note they have ignored it. Has anyone else been having this problem? What should I do about it?

In any case, I wish you all wonderful Holidays--Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Year's, and any others I might have missed.

Since I've received 3 emails plus Dawn's question, I thought I'd answer here:
If I can't blog, how did the post appear?
Good question you all. Apparently none of you have degrees in mind-reading, so I'll answer you. :) I downloaded Firefox. Using Firefox, I went to blogger.com to log in. I was already logged in. I dunno why or how. So that, my inquisitive readers, is how I was able to blog the first time and edit this time. :)

Thank God That's Over

2006-12-14T16:22:00.000-08:00

I made it through the week. I've never been stressed about finals like I was this semester. I had a really quirky group of classes this semester...Thank God it's over.

If I EVER mention I'm doubling up on history classes again, please someone smack me.

I think my grades will be decent, and for me that's close to miraculous. I've never cared much for or about school. I graduated high school a semester early just to get away from it.

I'm glad I took these particular classes this semester, as I finally have a goal in mind. Yes, I think I know what I want to be in the unlikely event that I ever grow up.

Fidget and I went Christmas shopping today. It was nice, no huge crowds, no one shoving. I even managed to sneak off and get her a "secret" present. I love it when I can do that. It's a little game we play when we're holiday shopping...I try to lose her in a store and take off to go shopping without her and she tries to not let me do that so she can see what she's getting.

On a completely different note: Our house is up for sale. We've decided to move, although we're staying more or less in this area (within 30 minutes of where we are). More on those specifics later. Here's what I'd like to know from my faithful reader: Are any of you familiar with burying St. Joseph upside down in your yard in order to sell your house? It's (supposedly, according to Fidget's mom) a Catholic thing. I don't know that I have faith in it, but it makes Fidget and her mom happy. Besides, I love to pick on Fidget's mom (from here on known as FM). The other night, Fidget and FM were on the phone talking about when FM was going to come and help us paint (yes, the faux painted walls that we just finished last spring need to be re-painted white...supposed to help the house sell faster...but I digress)...where was I...oh yes, the phone call. I yelled from across the room, "Ask your mom when she's coming to bury Jesus?!" teehee And whenever FM is in the room and the topic of selling a house comes up, I mention burying Jesus. teehee Or what really gets her, "Hey FM, is it legal to bury someone in your yard and then just move away?" (This was asked in a crowded restaurant.) TEEHEE

I know, I'm a shit.

FINALS WEEK APPROACHING...Danger Will Robinson!

2006-12-08T16:13:00.000-08:00

So, I believe I am about brain dead now. For the past week, the professors at my university have issued a series of challenges designed to rattle even the most studious of students. Papers, exams, presentations, essays (basically a paper, but the professor thinks it is less "intimidating" to students to call it an essay), and quizzes (it's an exam, see "essay"). Why the last minute rush? Why, it's finals week next week. As if we didn't have enough to do studying for finals, they crammed a shit load of extra in the week before.

Feminist perspectives, inaugural addresses, crime rates, essay exams, cumulative finals, recidivism rates, narcotrafficking, Colombian cocaine exports, abolitionism, suffrage, critical analysis of literature, slavery in the territories, genocide, prisoner empathy...and those are only a FEW of the items I've worked on since coming home from my last class today. What's funny? It's all starting to jumble in my mind...I've got William Lloyd Garrison coming from Colombia; Susan B. Anthony was pro-ERA; Glaspell as an anti-abolitionist...it's all a big, jumbled mess.

I think I'm giving it up for this evening. It means more work tomorrow, but I'm beat. I'm too old for this shit. One of my classmates asked if I'd like to come to a party tonight--I asked her if she was nuts?! Criminy.

I'm going to go and make myself a nice warm cup of soup and become an absolute vegetable in front of the TV. Mindless humor is called for here.

Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!

2006-11-20T15:36:00.000-08:00

I have friends who don't celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday for various reasons which I won't delve into here. But even in their lives, they take a moment to pause and reflect on things they are grateful for.

I'm grateful for so very many things...Friends, family, pets, and just being alive. It was not all that long ago that Fidget and I sat and had a long, emotionally charged conversation about my (seemingly) imminent death. No one could figure out what was wrong with me and yet my health steadily declined. Each day that I am alive is a new chance at life.

In all of the hustle and bustle of the holidays (it really doesn't seem to matter which one), sometimes we lose sight of the trees because we're so focused on the forest. For me, Thanksgiving is a chance to take a small step back and admire the trees.

We'll have 15 people at our house for Thanksgiving this year. The great wonder of this (especially for those who know me in real life) is that I am not really all that stressed about it. I haven't even gotten out the toothbrush to clean the vents and window sills...And I don't think I'm going to. This get-together is about so much more than having every nook and cranny spotless...It's about family.

Family, to me, is not just a matter of blood. Some of my closest family aren't blood relatives...And yet they are closer to me than I can say. They are not just relatives, they are my "chosen" family. One of the things I'm most grateful for this year is a re-connection with a long-lost "sister" from my high school years.

Holidays...time to take a step back and count our blessings, name by name.

I hope your Thanksgiving day is filled with things you love...Your favorite foods, people, or TV shows.

Ever have one of those weeks...?

2006-11-16T17:31:00.000-08:00

So, Fidget and I were busily counting our blessings...The house isn't falling in, our vehicles are running, we didn't have any major expenses. And then it happened. Every electronic gadget crapped out...simultaneously. First the cell phone went. So we got a new one. Then the house phones went (we have one of those cordless multi-handset thingies)...and we're still waiting on the new ones. Then the kitchen sink backed up and we had some sewer back up in our basement. One of the burners on the range top doesn't really work. The printer coughed twice and died. Our TV in the living room is going to be with Jesus soon...the sound works when it wants as does the picture...but usually one or the other works, just not always both at the same time. The washer is making an awful racket. The dryer sounds like a jet getting ready for take-off. I'm half scared to leave the office for a glass of water...I'm afraid what will die off next. And yes, all of this happened in the span of about 9 days.

But...As Dawn pointed out in the comments: There are still 38 shopping days until Christmas. That means, there is hope!

Lack of Posts

2006-11-13T11:31:00.000-08:00

I've really had a hard time finding anything interesting to post about lately. I have been doing nothing except studying my ass off. All the profs are having exams, quizzes, papers, presentations and extra assignments before Thanksgiving break. And when we come back from break we only have 2 weeks left of the semester...So it will be more of the same then, too. Augh!

Exhausted

2006-10-22T11:18:00.000-07:00

On top of having one hellatious bout with respiratory crap, we finished cleaning the basement this weekend. We had stuff from my parents (who were both from the Depression Era, and saved EVERYTHING), my stuff, Fidget's stuff, our stuff, the boys' stuff...And some stuff that no one knew where it came from. Our trash can is full to over-flowing, our garage is full of stuff to donate and garbage that wouldn't fit in the can...But our basement is wonderfully cleaned out. Still a few odds and ends to find "homes" for, but we are basically done. Got rid of 3 filing cabinets and their contents, most of the stuff needing to be shredded is done, and we filled a couple of boxes of old (like from the 80s and 90s) checkbooks that were my parents to take out to a friend's farm to burn. There were no less than 4 HUGE barrels of toys and stuffed animals from when I was little...So little I didn't remember most of it. Boxes of my old report cards and school work. Why did we save that crap? The good news is, I think Fidget will be more selective about what she saves from the boys. Good Lord, did we have stuff.

We still have about 6 plastic bins full of "Keepsake" type items...Stuff that belonged to my parents that I'm not ready to get rid of yet. We got rid of about 25 bins of that stuff. Eventually (like after the holidays) we're going to go through those bins and try to have a couple of shadow boxes made, or something like that. I'm a believer in the idea that if I'm going to save something because it means something to me, it should be displayed, not kept in a box in my basement.

Last night our deck and side lawn looked like the Clampitts moved in with Sanford and Son. In addition to the donate boxes on part of the deck (wouldn't fit in the garage) and a HUGE mound of garbage on the other side of the deck (wouldn't fit anywhere else) we had our side lawn FULL of stuff with a nice little "Free" sign next to it. This morning there are only a few things left, and we'll leave them out there until tomorrow. If they're still there, we'll start calling Goodwill and places like that to see if we can get rid of them that way. We talked about having a garage sale in the Spring/Summer, but the sheer volume of stuff we were getting rid of put us off of that idea quickly. Having to park our vehicles outside during a Minnesota winter so that we could store all of it didn't appeal to either of us. Most of what we donate is tax-deductible, so we'll make a little that way. What's most important to us is that...All that stuff is no longer our problem.

I'm exhausted just thinking about everything we did this weekend. I still have to do my homework, including putting together a presentation for tomorrow. But I can't tell you what a relief it is to have it done!

Ahhhh...Vacation (Almost)

2006-10-12T20:54:00.000-07:00

We have our mid-semester break, meaning no school on Monday and Tuesday of next week. And, since my Lit and Justice profs cancelled class tomorrow I get to have a 5 day weekend. Sort of.

I've been procrastinating on a paper for one of my World History in the 20th Century class. I'm supposed to research a topic, interview someone over or near the age of 60 and write a paper. My interviews were done 2 weeks ago. I finished up some research last week, but otherwise the majority of the research was done 2 weeks ago as well. I just can't seem to make myself sit down and write the damn paper. I chose Stonewall as a topic, so it's not for lack of interest in the subject. I need to get a little more info for a couple of my references, but basically all that is left is to write the paper...And papers I am good at. Hopefully I will get it mostly done tomorrow, proofread and edit on Saturday, then finish up the bibliography on Sunday. If I do that I will still have 2 (mostly) free days to relax and not have to think about it.

In my other history class, US History through 1865, we have 2 tests and a paper. That's it, that's our whole grade. As I mentioned before, History is NOT my subject. I'm terrible at remembering dates, and I suck at geography. Took our first essay test in there 2 weeks ago...Got the test back today and...I got an A. BIG ASS GRIN!

Have gotten B's on my Lit papers so far, and hopefully can bring that up to an A. Got a B on a hard-as-hell Justice exam. So classes are going fairly well. Getting decent grades doesn't come easy for me and it never has. I used to be content with whatever grade I got, as long as it was at least a C. Now they've suddenly become somewhat important. Weird.

That's my little update. Oh...and there are only like 73 days until Christmas. :)

Banks vs. Credit Unions

2006-10-05T17:23:00.000-07:00

I've been reading a number of financial blogs lately. I've always been interested in money and how to make it grow, how to best reduce debt, etc. Anyway, I came across a few entries about banks versus credit unions and how credit unions usually give you a better interest rate. I did some homework, the Princess made a few calls and lo and behold! A credit union in the next town (that we are eligible to join) has a savings account with twice the amount of interest that we currently have at our bank. Here's my question: Is it really that easy? Or is there a catch of some kind? Should I transfer all of our savings over to the new bank, or should I leave some in my old savings account? Anyone, anyone, Bueller?

News Flash

2006-09-27T20:26:00.000-07:00

This just in...Only 88 days until Christmas.

That is all.

How We Acquired a Jeep

2006-09-19T15:37:00.000-07:00

Our mini-van died. As in it would cost more to fix than it was worth (the ENTIRE electrical system went, and was confirmed by our mechanic). Yes, the mini-van we've only had for about 4 months. We definitely need 2 vehicles that are reliable (including one that can haul a family of 5 and a ton of gear), so I can't just go and buy a $500 piece of crap to get around town in. So Fidget and I discussed it, and decided the only thing we could do was trade the van in. Not what we had planned to do, but it had to be done. Obviously the van wasn't paid for since we'd only had it for 4 months, so we were a bit limited as to what we could do. We couldn't stay in the price range that we set as ideal because we had to roll the remainder of the van loan into the loan for whatever we bought. Keep in mind we live in the middle of nowhere, and our choices were very limited. We went to a dealership who had no vehicles in our price range. The next one we went to had one. Then we went to our favorite dealership and they had 2...well, okay, they actually had 3, but one of the three was a 1997 suburban with a 17 inch lift kit so we were able to eliminate that one right off the bat. We ended up with a 2004 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo with 131,000 miles on it. It was a sales vehicle and the dealership that we trust had done all the service on it, and was willing to show us the records for it. It gets the same mpg as the van did, so we were okay there (the van got 21 mpg, the Jeep gets 20). Our interest rate BITES. Apparently when you purchase a vehicle with more than 100,000 miles on it they add 3 points to your interest rate automatically.

We did the best job we could with the options we had. Obviously if we could have afforded to make a better deal, we would have. I'm no slouch in dealing with salesman, and I normally walk away from a car deal with Fidget going, "How in the hell did you do that?" Seriously. I get the lowest price, the best interest rate possible, and I usually get them to add features to the vehicle if there's something we want but that it doesn't have--and they pay for it.

One of Fidget's co-workers actually had the balls to ask how much I make in order to afford the Jeep. My favorite comment from a friend was, "You change cars more than more people change underwear." Good grief, are we the only people that something like this has happened to?

We didn't plan this. Shit happens. I'm am tiring quickly of people saying, "do you part for the environment", "why did you buy a gas-guzzler", etc. Oh, my favorite..."Must be nice to trade a vehicle just because you're sick of it." GRRRRowLL.

Didn't we all grow up hearing, "Don't judge a book by its cover"? My response to Fidget's co-worker? I would have said, "Well, as soon as you start taking over the payments I'll make you privy to our personal finances." Of course, Fidget is not as blunt as I. But she still feels the need to explain our every action to anyone who might judge or ask. (Which really aggravates me, but perhaps that's a story for another time.)

My point? I had one. Really I did. Oh yeah. The Jeep was an unexpected purchase. It was more than we had budgeted (as we thought we'd be driving the van for several years). But I LOVE driving it. It's a comfortable ride, it's not a gas-guzzler like I feared it might be (my Explorer only used to get about 16 mpg--OUCH!), and after I cleaned it up it looked pretty nice.

I would like to hear from people who have owned Jeeps...How many miles did you have on it? How long did it go? Things like that. Feel free to comment or email me. Thanks!

100 Things About Me

2006-09-02T21:55:00.000-07:00

So, I was reading Frugal For Life (and if you haven't been there yet, please go visit...Just click that link that's off to the right...It's okay, I'll wait here, take your time) and Dawn has posted a 100 Things list. Which got me to thinking, "Could I come up with 100 interesting things about me?" And the answer, after much arguing and bickering amongst myself ("yes, I think I can!" "No, no way can I come up with that many.") followed by a time out during which I processed with myself the danger of talking to myself...Well, anyway, here's my attempt at the list. So...17 days later, and I'm stumped. So, instead of 100 things, here's 59.

1. I was born and raised in Iowa.
2. I liked it.
3. Out of all the vehicles that I have owned through the years, my favorite is still the 1985
Honda Prelude that I drove in high school/early college.
4. I paid for it myself.
5. The only accident I was ever in that was my fault was in that car.
6. I was not speeding or drinking or using drugs.
7. I hated high school so much that I graduated early.
8. I did not attend my own graduation.
9. I also do not know my class song, motto or anything else about the ceremony.
10. I don't feel like I missed much.
11. I used to work as a counselor in a psychiatric medical institution for children.
12. I also did crisis intervention, and also worked with battered women and their children and
victims of sexual assault.
13. I burned myself out and to this day have the utmost respect for the professionals who work
in those fields for years and years.
14. My favorite job (so far) has been being an EMT.
15. I have saved lives.
16. I have watched people die.
17. I have saved people who wanted to die.
18. One of them is still angry that he is alive.
19. I have 7 pets.
20. They are all spoiled rotten with love and attention.
21. I don't like tomatoes.
22. I do like peas.
23. I don't use drugs.
24. I used to.
25. There are large chunks of the 80s and 90s that I cannot remember because of this.
26. I do smoke cigarettes.
27. I can't count the number of times that I've tried to quit.
28. I still miss my parents (they're both deceased).
29. I have lived in 4 states: Iowa, Minnesota, Colorado, and Oklahoma.
30. I have been to traffic school.
31. It was for speeding tickets.
32. I've only had 2 since. (Oh, come on, 2 tickets in 12 years?! For anyone who knows me,
they would think this is miraculous.)
33. The most recent ticket I received was after I bought my partner her ring. I was so excited to get home that I forgot to set the cruise control.
34. I have hit a skunk with an ambulance.
35. I have gone skydiving...Once.
36. I am afraid of flying (in an airplane...I mean, I'm not afraid that I'll just suddenly go
airborne or anything like that).
37. My middle name is the same as my mother's.
38. I'm not telling.
39. My partner's favorite musician is Neil Diamond, and I took her to the concert.
40. I secretly (and not so secretly) sort of enjoyed it.
41. I would do ANYTHING to quit smoking for good.
42. I am truly afraid that I am going to fail my history classes.
43. I still don't know what I want to be when I "grow up".
44. I've had a blast (and supported myself and my family) trying all kinds of different jobs.
45. I have known many born-again Christians.
46. I have known only 2 who actually seem to"walk the walk". My dentist and my friend DC
from high school.
47. I have never been on one of those "terror tower" rides. (You know, the ones where you are
up against the wall and spinning and the floor drops out from under you?) I completely
understand the physics...But I am still too terrified to try them.
48. I love the Harry Potter books.
49. I love to play "tycoon" games (like Rollercoaster Tycoon, Zoo Tycoon, etc.)
50. If I could have one wish...It would be to have more time with my mom.
51. I think "Mein Kampf" should be required reading in high school.
52. I think we are not learning from our mistakes.
53. I love Rosie O'Donnell.
54. If I could meet one famous person, it would be her.
55. I sent a hate letter once, to a neighbor who was convicted of molesting his daughters.
56. I signed my own name to it.
57. I have currently been working on this list off and on for 17 days.
58. I have 7 tattoos.
59. I cry every time I hear a 21 gun salute and taps.
60. I can't believe I can only come up with 59 things about myself.

Yes, Virginia, I do have a large ass

2006-08-28T17:21:00.000-07:00

So last week my university began its fall semester. My first class was Lit, nothing too serious or impossibly challenging there--or so it sounds. I simply sat at the table, introduced myself and smiled a lot. My second class was Intro to Justice. I have a problem now. Since I was last a student at this university I have changed.

Oh, yes...I've become older and wiser. I don't really care what kind of a fashion statement I make (or don't make) these days. But...after the last couple of years of health issues (I think I mentioned this in a previous post) I gained about 130 pounds. This wouldn't be much of a problem if I had started off weighing say...30 pounds. But, I've never been skinny. When I graduated high school I was a muscular 160 pounds. So, yes, that tops me out at close to 300. I have lost 47 pounds, and will continue to make efforts to lose another 90-100. I think we all know that this will not happen in the next week or two.

So, you may be asking, what does this have to do with school? Is it the stairs? No, it's not the stairs...The stairs are merely a daily reminder that a year ago I would have been forced to use the elevator as I did not have the strength nor the energy to do even a few stairs. I am a little out of breath at the top, but I do them daily--and am very, very grateful that I can.

The problem is--the desks. I had never really given much thought to the desks...Certainly they weren't as comfortable as an easy chair or a laz-boy...But certainly they were adequate for their purpose.

I wedged myself into the desk fairly well. I found that I could breathe or see my notes (with the weight gain came EXCEPTIONALLY large breasts), but that I could not do both at the same time. Not convenient, but I did manage this as well. I got myself into a system. And then class was over. I attempted to get up...and for those of you who don't realize this, getting out of one of those desks is apparently a conditioned-response type of thing. However...this method no longer works for me. If I try to stand up, I would take the desk with me. I sat back down, and in order to give myself some time to ponder my dilemma...I decide to lean down and put my books back into my bag. Which goes okay...Gives other students time to leave, etc. At least if I'm going to embarrass myself there will be fewer witness, right? Right. As I sit up, one of my breasts becomes lodged between me and the desk. Great. I finally found that by reaching around toward the middle of my back and grabbing the back of the chair and using the other hand to push off the desktop, I can unwedge myself from the desk. It's really okay to laugh, once I realized I wasn't going to have to go through life wearing the desk, I almost wet my pants laughing.

I stop to gather my bag and take a quick look around. No one is laughing at me. I have either pulled off this feat without drawing unnecessary attention, or the other students are very kind. I assume it is a combination of the two.

Back to School

2006-08-19T13:06:00.000-07:00

School starts for me on Monday. I feel like I'm forgetting something major, that I'm not quite prepared to go back. I sat down earlier today to make a list of everything that I needed like ID, parking permit, etc. I have checked off everything on my list. Which makes me even more anxious, because then I think, "Wow, I'm really missing the boat on something. I don't even know what I need." Which of course isn't true at all. Other than one textbook, I even have all of my books...And that text won't be in until mid-September. So it's probably just the jitters...I hope.

Comments

2006-07-21T13:51:00.000-07:00

Since every time I allow unmoderated comments I get nailed by comment bots...My comments will now be moderated. Please feel free to continue commenting...I will allow all comments except the spam.

Melissa

2006-07-20T08:35:00.000-07:00

Went to the Melissa Etheridge concert on Tuesday night. She was wonderful. Her wife is very pregnant, and she said they are excited about their twins. Amazing concert. Definitely worth the money, definitely will see her again.

Dentures...

2006-07-05T15:16:00.000-07:00

So, what I had initially said was going to be a "secret" is now, basically, public knowledge. My oral surgery...I had all but 6 teeth pulled, got a full upper denture and bottom partial. And, of course, have had almost every possible complication known to man. And through it all, my dentist and his staff have been WONDERFUL. That said...

I had mild dry sockets. They weren't as bad as I thought they would be, but I wouldn't want to have one just for fun either.

I have paresthesia...Part of my chin area is numb and may or may not be that way forever.

I got sores (and still have MANY) all over my mouth from where the dentures rub. This is compounded by the fact that I have a small mouth (yes, I know that many of you would disagree, however this is a medical fact and I can prove it). :)

I have had frequent visits to the dentist, which is common after getting dentures. They "shave" and "grind" on the dentures to help them fit better as my swelling goes down, and they also place temporary liners to help keep my teeth from falling out. And yes, liners do make a difference...I sneezed the other day, my upper plate shot out of my mouth and hit the dog. She was not impressed. I have had PAIN (not discomfort, not "owies", PAIN!) in more or less the same areas. They explained to me that they didn't want to grind too much off at once because as my gums change with healing it should start feeling better. Made sense. So for the last 22 days I have had no solid foods. If I can't swallow it without chewing, it hasn't gone into my mouth. I have lost 15 pounds--good for now, but I am well aware that it will all come back the moment I start eating again, no matter how healthy I eat. But I digress...

At my last appointment the dental tech told me I should leave my dentures out for longer periods of time to allow my gums to heal. Okay. So I took them out for a few hours. HOLY HANNAH! I couldn't hardly get the top one back in! PAIN! Apparently one side of the upper was WAAAAY too long, and pressing on a nerve. Wonderful. So I left them out last night. And discover a hard thing way in the back, on the bottom distal area of my mouth (back near where my wisdom teeth would have been, on the tongue side). Very large to be one of the bone chips they mentioned, which up to this point have been about the size of 5 salt crystals melded together.

So, this morning, I call my dentist's office, make the trek in (toothless, I might add) and sit in the chair and explain my problems. The dental tech (I don't usually see the doc at these appointments) pokes around a bit, identifies some problem areas, and tells me that the "white" spot in the back of my mouth appears to be a huge canker. I 'splain to her that it's really, really hard and ask if it could be some kind of mutant bone chip. She taps on it (which hurts like a bitch) and confirms that it's not a sore. She states that sometimes the doc will numb up a patient and remove these things, as they can rub against the partial and cause pain. (So far, she hasn't shared anything I didn't already know.) And again, explains that pain is normal and that it will go away. So she leaves the room to go and get the doc to come take a look.

Now, up to this point, everyone (including Fidget) has been, "oh, I know it hurts, honey...just be brave and it will be better soon." Let it be said here, I have a very high tolerance for pain and I make a conscious effort to not complain, regardless of where or why I hurt.

The doc comes in, takes a quick look at my gums and states they are healing nicely. This part is good. Then he gets to the "white" spot...And confers with the tech that he is looking at what we would like to have removed. She confirms that it is. He calmly states, "I think we should leave it. It's her mandible."

Yes, the partial has worn away all the gum tissue down to my jawbone. Immediately, the tech starts shuddering and says, "I'm sorry, but that has GOT to hurt." Ya think?!

Review of Week

2006-06-25T07:28:00.000-07:00

The past 12 days have mostly sucked. I got all of my teeth pulled, except for 6 on the bottom. I still can't eat. My mouth still hurts. The only good news is: A) I never have to do this again and B) my black eye is finally gone. Anyone know of anything liquid that tastes good that I can consume? I'm getting REALLY tired of jello, boullion, soup and pudding. I'm not much of an ice cream fan, so I'm about out of ideas. More on the mouth thing later.

One of my best friends from high school contacted me this week. That has been really cool. I am enjoying getting to know her all over again.

Fidget's new dog is a royal pain in the ass. And she's not very smart, either. But she LOVES Fidget, so I guess it's all good. I will give her this--She's a lot easier on toys than the bigger dogs that I enjoy. And we were able to replace the thick chain in the front with a clothesline rope to let her out on.

Not very exciting, but that's all the news for now.

Just another day...

2006-06-12T12:35:00.000-07:00

we're having near record low temps this week. it actually got down to 46 the other night. weird.

getting anonymous, obviously "junk" comments, may have to get rid of comments soon if that continues.

boys are swimming everyday, and the two youngest started baseball today. can't believe how fast they're growing.

having surgery on wednesday, wish me luck.

Sad News

2006-06-04T11:36:00.000-07:00

Our dog, Sadie, has cancer. We are going to help her transition "over the rainbow bridge" on Monday morning. We had just found a schnoodle pup to be a companion to her (we had always had two dogs, until her last pal outgrew our home), and the boys have decided that they still want to get the puppy. Many tears over this weekend. The oldest boy asked if he could have her collar. He is taking it the hardest...He and Sadie are pretty good buddies.

AC Troubles

2006-05-24T16:01:00.000-07:00

My father had a tradition every spring...On the first humid day of the year he would close up the house and turn on the AC to make sure it worked correctly. I have continued this tradition. And ours sounds like a jet propellor that someone forgot to tighten the bolts onto. This is not good. So I called our local True Value store (it's a small town, the TV does it all here) and they sent out a repairman. A repairman who doesn' t work on this particular brand of AC units. Great! It's just all getting better. He THINKS the problem is a bearing in the compressor...So I ask him, can it be fixed? And he says it can, but he can't do it and he doesn't know anyone in the area who works on this brand since Old Man Smith (or some such person) retired 10 years ago...And besides, if I'm going to replace the compressor I might as well just buy a new unit because the cost is comparable. So I ask...How long will it last the way it is? His estimate? (Go ahead, you might as well guess...Your guess will probably be as good as his.) "Could die tomorrow, could last 10 more years." Funny, I think I could have hired a neighbor kid to say that and only paid them $5 for their time.

So...Today, Fidget called a different repair place in a neighboring town. She was on the phone with him for 15 minutes as he patiently answered our questions. He's going to come and take a look in the next couple of days and see what he can do with it.

Anyone know anything about AC? Our unit is about 14 years old...Should we replace the whole thing, just the compressor, or should we just bite our lip and hope it doesn't quit when it's 105? Calls, emails or comments appreciated.

Furniture Be-Gone!

2006-05-16T09:50:00.000-07:00

So, May is "free" garbage month here...That just means that if you exceed your allowed amount of garbage, you don't get charged extra. So...We purged. Big time. We got rid of 2 big, heavy tables, a duncan fife table with four chairs, a rocking chair, 3 end tables, an entire laundry basket full of old records...and a ton of other stuff. The furniture we gave to a neighbor, and all the other stuff was picked up by someone who filled the back of their truck. I thought we were "working poor"...But I guess that since everyone wants what's in our garbage pile we must be doing better than I thought.

I can't believe the weather...

2006-05-03T14:59:00.000-07:00

It's been cold and rainy for days...and my joints are reminding me that they don't like this. (I have arthritis.) It's 55 today, but because of the wind it feels 45. It's MAY for crying out loud!

WTF?

2006-04-24T15:03:00.000-07:00

School...This week and next week and then finals. Went to class today, and was told there won't be class for the rest of the week--My instructor will be out of town. 2 WEEKS BEFORE FINALS?!

Question of the day

2006-04-13T10:14:00.000-07:00

Is life too short to put up with shit OR is it too short not to?

Looong Week

2006-04-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

Test yesterday, paper due tomorrow. And, well, I don't really want to study at all. I have the worst case of spring fever that I think I've ever had. I need a fairy to come and do all of my homework and housecleaning so that I can just go sit on my deck and drink iced tea.

autopsy results

2006-04-10T17:36:00.000-07:00

Just found out that my friend died from alcohol poisoning. The coroner had ordered an autopsy because the death looked "suspicious". They're guessing that all the blood must have come from the fall...Either she hit her nose or cracked her head. I am shocked. I think I'm more shocked now because in the back of my mind I had convinced myself that there must have been a fight and things got out of hand...or something. She was 43 and she drank herself to death. Very sad.

Long, boring weekend

2006-04-09T12:17:00.000-07:00

Nothing exciting going on...I've spent most of the weekend cleaning and studying.

Fidget called, Larry didn't make the top 3 in the individual, but his team was in 1st place the last time I talked to her. I also talked with Bo briefly, he's so funny. He's surrounded by a bazillion kids, parents and other spectators--this is our conversation.
"Hi Stacey."
"Hi buddy, how are you?"
"Ok. We haven't gone swimming yet."
"Well, maybe you'll go tonight."
"I love you."
"I love you too, buddy. Are you having fun?"
"Yeah...GUESS WHAT????!!! ON SUNDAY...nevermind."
"Okay, you be good for your mom, okay?"
"I guess...mom wants to talk to you now."

All that activity, and the kid is dying to swim at the hotel. He's so 7.

This and That

2006-04-05T20:59:00.000-07:00

Fidget has 3 boys...hmm...what cutesy nicknames shall I give them for this blog? The oldest shall be Larry (he loves "Git R Done"). The middle shall be River (he loves nature). The youngest shall be Bo (he's a natural athlete).

Anyway, Larry is wrestling in the state tournament this weekend. River and Bo didn't make it, but they are excited for their brother. Larry is beside himself with pride, and he deserves to
be--he worked his butt off this year. Fidget and the boys are headed off for the entire weekend leaving the zoo and I to fend for ourselves. She has already made me promise not to add to the zoo while she's gone.

It's kind of funny to watch her reactions...There are a couple of stray cats in our neighborhood, one of them is an adorable orange tabby. I keep telling her, "We don't have one like that yet." I always add the yet...It keeps her on her toes.

Found the List

2006-04-04T09:53:00.000-07:00

On my previous blog I had several readers who had sent me questions that they wanted me to answer. After shutting down the blog I lost the list...The list is now found. I will try to answer at least one of these questions each week. You too can join in the fun of question/answer by emailing me or commenting. (It goes without saying that all of the names and identifying information in my blog have been changed, including call numbers/signs.)

Reader question: "Can you tell about an ambulance run for a small child? Can you please expain the terminology you use?"

Before answering the question directly, I'll need to tell you (just this once) how our service works. When I started as an EMT we were a BLS (Basic Life Support) service and we were in the middle of transitioning into a part-time ALS (Advanced Life Support) service. The difference, in a nutshell, is the availability of a paramedic. If there is a paramedic on the rig it's ALS. Back then, the only medic was our director, Eugene. (We now have a full-time ALS service.) Enough background, onto the question...

It had been a relatively quiet spring day. I had a new EMT on with me, and the few runs we had been on that day had been pretty routine stuff and I had been able to walk her through patient care, only doing the tasks that she hadn't yet been certified in (things like starting the IVs and giving nebulizer treatments).

The pager goes off: "Dispatch to ____ ambulance, you are needed at 123 Sesame Street for a baby who is seizing; repeat you are needed at 123 Sesame Street for a baby who is seizing. Dispatch clear 1456." (1456 is the time stamp.)
I jog across the street from the hospital to the ambulance garage to find Sally leaning against her car. She is white as a ghost. I continue jogging to the rig and tell her, "Let's go!" She climbs in next to me and says, "I can't do this."
As I start the rig and reach for the radio, I calmly explain that we don't have a choice. We have to do this, and that I will run the call and she can assist. I also have her check her own pulse...It gives her something to focus on. There's a saying, "Once you find your own pulse, then you can look for your patient's." Or something like that.

"102 to dispatch, we are enroute code 3." (Code 3 means with great urgency--Lights and sirens.)
"10-4 102 1457."
"102 to dispatch, please page out for Eugene, 102 requesting ALS intercept at scene." (An ALS intercept means that we don't have a medic with us, but believe we need one. The younger the child, the faster they can crash. Only a medic can intubate (insert a breathing tube) in an infant, and in our area only a medic can start an IV on an infant, and I don't want to take any chances that aren't absolutely necessary. )
"10-4 102." (Pager goes off again, requesting Eugene at the scene.)
The call is outside of town, and it will take us a couple of minutes to get there.
"Dispatch to 102"
"102, go ahead dispatch"
"102 be advised, caller states infant is not breathing."
Shit. We all dread this call.
"10-4 dispatch, what's the status on our intercept?"
Just then I see Eugene pulling up to a stop sign at an intersection about 100 yards in front of us.
"Intercept is en route."
I stop to let Eugene in, then continue towards the scene.
"102 to dispatch, we have the medic on board."
"10-4 102 1459."
After driving a bit farther, I see the house we're heading to. "102 to dispatch, we are on scene."
"10-4 102 1501."

We arrive on scene to find a mob...Mom, grandma, neighbors, and a lone deputy trying to maintain order. We skip the cot, grab the jump bag, cardiac monitor and drug box. Sally has brought the ped bag, which we don't need but at least she's thinking again. Eugene gives Sally the job of helping the deputy. It is her job to talk to the mom and grandma, explain what we are doing and keep them far enough back that we can work.

The baby, who appears to be approximately 2 years of age, is breathing on it's own, but is lethargic. I begin connecting the cardiac monitor, Eugene starts an IV. As Eugene continues assessment, I get the cot. Ironically, mom and grandma are much calmer after our arrival--but the neighbors are not. Eugene decides to "load and go". (Load and go...pretty much what it sounds like. We'll finish stabilizing the patient en route to the hospital. Load and go's usually occur when either the patient is exceptionally critical and field stabilization is unlikely or the scene is unsafe. One of the neighbors is being physically restrained by the deputy, which is what triggers the decision in this case.)

We load our patient. I explain to Sally that I will drive us to the hospital and ask her to assist Eugene in the back. (Rookie drivers tend to be a bit erratic, which can lead to all sorts of unpleasant things like accidents with other vehicles or the medic/EMT in the back getting tossed around like a rag doll.) Mom and grandma both want to ride with the child. I explain that ONE of them can ride up front with me, but only if they are very, very quiet and don't bother Eugene. Mom agrees and climbs in. I ask her to buckle up as I do the same.

With adult patients we typically do not return to the hospital code 3, but this is a child. Because children can crash quickly, we generally do return code 3 if it's anything potentially life-threatening. I tell Mom that we are going to drive fairly quickly, and that she will hear the siren. (I tell her this so that she understands that her child is still okay, that it's our protocol. When an average person hears the siren, they tend to panic, and I don't want her to do that.)

"102 to dispatch."
"dispatch, go ahead."
"102 enroute code 3 to ____ hospital with one."
"10-4 102, 1506."

Eugene calls in report to the hospital, we drop off our patient, check in with Mom and clean and re-stock the rig. It all takes about 20 minutes from start to finish.

Yes, Sally is still with the service. She is a fantastic EMT. And yes, we still tease her...Because every EMT/medic has thought exactly what she said, "I can't do this." There is one run in every emergency responder's history that has triggered that phrase, most of us just don't say it out loud. Our experience, training, and partners do exactly what they're supposed to do in this situation--They kick in. Our partner reminds us that this is what we've trained long and hard for, to make a difference. Our training has given us algorithms and protocols to follow. And our experience reminds us that we've done other things we didn't think we could do and it turned out just fine.

Friends

2006-04-03T21:34:00.000-07:00

Friday morning a friend of mine was found dead on her living room floor. She was 43.

We had sort of drifted apart the last few years. She (and her sister, who is also a friend) had chosen a different way of life, and I had given up the "party" lifestyle. We saw each other around town. I was on the c-section team when her daughter gave birth (though for the life of me I can't remember if we ended up doing a section or not). But mostly we saw each other at funerals...my mom's, their dad's, their mom's, my dad's, their sister's. Every time we saw each other we always said, "Call me!" "Let's get together!" and all of those things. But we were busy...Had responsibilities and things that came up and...now it's too late.

In this small, often judgemental community that I live in, real true friends are few and far between. Being gay in a small town (at least this small town) can be wearing. She, nor her family, ever judged me. They maintained open arms, and they also liked my current partner. (None of my friends cared for my ex.) The love was always real, if unspoken.

I spoke to her sister at the visitation this evening. The connection was instant...I don't know if it struck her as it did me, but it dawned on me. Real friends...I know that if I need her she will be there. I won't have to call or go knocking on her door. I just know. We haven't seen each other or spoken in about a year. But she knew I would be there. "I wondered what time you'd come around."

This post probably doesn't make any sense to anyone but me...I just needed to write.

Alphabet

2006-04-02T10:27:00.000-07:00

So, a friend of mine suggested I put up one of those trendy little alphabet lists...If a reader is interested, I guess I will.
A--
B--
C--
D--
E--
F--
G--
H--
I--
J--
K--
L--
M--
N--
O--
P--
Q--
R--
S--
T--
U--
V--
W--
X--
Y--
Z--
I would have thought someone would have already put the alphabet on the internet somewhere, but apparently she couldn't find it. I hope this helps.

Radon

2006-03-25T13:22:00.000-08:00

Radon is silent and deadly. It is the second leading cause of lung cancer in the US. A couple of months ago, Fidget and I were watching the news and there was a brief story about radon. We decided to send off for a free test kit. The ideal level for radon is below 2.0. The "safe" level is considered to be 2.0 - 4.0; you're supposed to fix anything above 4. Our first short-term reading was 16.6. So we followed the directions, sent for a second short-term test and contacted a local radon mitigator (someone who can fix the problem). Our second test was 13.8. So we decided it was well worth the $1500 to have the problem fixed.

Radon comes from several sources, but the main one is from rock--namely granite rock. The granite breaks down, releasing uranium and creating radon.

Our local mitigator came in and sealed our sump pump holes and installed some 3-inch piping which connects to a fan on the outside of our house. The fan is used to create a vacuum, and it sucks the radon and moisture out from below our foundation and expels it above the roof line. He follows up the installation with a 48-hour continuous radon monitor which will give us an hour-by-hour reading of the radon levels in our basement.

Having talked about all the mundane things in my life, I thought it time to mention something worthwhile. You can purchase a radon test kit at most hardware stores, pubic health offices, and there are a limited number available free on the internet. It's easy to do: Set it up, take it down and drop it in the mail. If you include your email address on the form they will email the results to you. Otherwise you can look on the website or they'll mail the results to you.

Please take 30 minutes and make sure your home is safe.

Thank You

2006-03-25T07:25:00.000-08:00

Two people emailed me about quitting smoking. I thank both of you for your words of experience. Cold turkey it is. Today.

Smoking

2006-03-21T07:37:00.000-08:00

Both of my parents died from lung cancer. I used to work in the respiratory department of the hospital. I know better than to smoke. WHY IS IT SO DAMN HARD TO QUIT?! I tried to quit yesterday...I ended up smoking like 6 or 7 cigarettes. That's better than my usual pack a day plus, but...I want to quit. Like never do it again. Anyone have any suggestions or stories?

Spring Break

2006-03-14T18:16:00.000-08:00

Nothing exciting happening, it's spring break for me this week--And apparently I'm too old to go anywhere. Well, not really, but it certainly feels that way.

As most of you know I've had some major health problems crop up in the last couple of years. Every day has seemed like it's own battle. I ran into a friend the other day...Not just any friend. He happens to be the medic that runs our local ambulance service, my old boss. And a true friend. (I'll call him Eugene.) I stepped down from the service over a year ago because of some health problems, and he's still waiting for me to come back. Every time I see this man he asks me, "When the hell are you coming back? We need you godammit." And I tear up every damn time. EMS is my life. I would have completed medic school by know--if it weren't for my health. The most major of the health issues have been dealt with, and I could return to the squad anytime. But...because of inactivity, pain, medication, etc. I've gained a shitload of weight, and my muscles have turned to sludge. Until I am certain that I am capable of carrying people down stairs, out of ravines, and pulling them out of mangled cars I won't return. Those who don't work in EMS may think that sounds like a bunch of bravado shit; those who do or have worked in the field know it's just basic patient care. My knowledge is meaningless unless I can implement it.

Rural EMS is very different than "city-slicker" EMS. In a city, you're usually within 8 minutes of a receiving facility. Not always the case out here in the sticks. Our local hospital is a critical access hospital, so we also do loads of ALS intercepts. Our EMT-Bs are some of the most trained in the state. We have several variances that enable us to do almost everything a medic can do, except give drugs...And there are a few drugs we can give as well. We start IV's, read strips, etc. There is a certain pride that comes with being one of the squad, and also a feeling of family. 4 years ago when I became an EMT our squad was very, very small. We were only part-time ALS. There were only 2 people on call at one time (which, as far as I know, is still the case). When it's you and one other person, with the nearest aid over 30 minutes away you learn to depend on one another in a way that very few people can ever understand.

God I miss it.

Sigh

2006-03-08T13:58:00.000-08:00

The college I attend is 43 miles away. I have only one class this semester...It meets Monday, Wednesday and Friday for an hour each day. My college has a neat-o notification system--There is a phone number you can call that has a recording to let you know if classes are cancelled due to weather or instructor illness. Since my class meets at 1000, I need to leave by 0830 in order to get to the college, find a parking spot in the back 40 and make it to class on time. Because my instructor has been pretty sick for the last week and she told us on Monday that the only reason she didn't cancel class that day was because we were having a test, I called the
neat-o number this morning before I left. Considering she's supposed to be in her office from 9-10, I assumed that if class were cancelled (you see where this is going, right?)...I assumed she would have called in before 0830...And I also assumed that the neat-o recording is updated on a reasonably frequent basis. So I call...Nothing is cancelled today. I had left a few minutes early to get gas, so I was in the parking lot around 0905. An hour early, I relaxed in my car and read a book. I went in for class only to find out that it was cancelled. So I call the neat-o number...Nothing is cancelled. Hmm. I head to the office, and politely ask if there is a way for commuter students to find out if classes are cancelled before trekking their way to campus. And she hands me a card with the neat-o number on it. I explain that I've called it twice and nothing is cancelled. She smiles and tells me I must be mistaken. I smile back and ask her if she would mind giving it a try, perhaps I'd done something wrong. So she calls...And nothing is cancelled. She then informs me that I should go to class. I explain about the large note on the door cancelling all of this instructor's classes for the day, signed by the department secretary. She rings up the secretary...Whispers with her for a couple of moments, giggles, hangs up. She tells me class is cancelled. I thank her for her help and leave before she decides to teach the class herself. Sigh.

Funny

2006-03-02T13:45:00.000-08:00

Benign joke was removed due to the fact that it caused an error to "mysteriously" appear. Hmmm....

To Be a Cat

2006-02-27T12:03:00.000-08:00

Thanks to my 2 readers for the get well wishes. No bird flu here! :) I'm still not 100%, but am feeling much better.

After visiting SoapBox Blog, and commenting there on my pets' behaviors...I've decided I want to be a cat.

Reasons to be a cat:
1. Cats can sleep whenever and wherever they want.
2. Someone else cleans their bathroom.
3. Someone always makes sure they have plenty of food and water. And if the water isn't fresh enough, all they have to do is knock the bowl over, spilling the "bad" water, and it will be quickly replaced.
4. If they want attention they simply demand it. Can you imagine crawling onto the couch next to your significant other, discovering that their book/magazine/newspaper is still more interesting than you...So you simply climb onto said book/magazine/newspaper and place a paw on their chin. Fidget chuckles when the cats do this. She also slaps me when I do.
5. On the other hand, if you try to pet a cat and they ignore you, most humans will simply shrug and say, "Yup, acts like a cat." (Try this with your significant other and you will most likely find yourself sleeping on the sofa while the cat sleeps in your bed.)
6. If cats get a sudden urge to be in another room...ZOOOOOM!! They're there. Maybe it's just our cats, but every once in a while one of them will awaken, stretch, sit and think for a moment and then ZOOOOOM! What is this about? (Again, imagine your other half's reaction if you would get out of the easy chair, stretch and then tear hell for a random room, only to sit down, whip out a wash cloth and begin wiping at your face upon arrival. No, I haven't tried this one yet...I wonder what Fidget would say?)
7. Conversely, no one thinks much of it when a cat just sort of wanders aimlessly through the house. When humans do this, we call it "dementia".
8. If someone pisses off a cat, the cat will twitch their tail and hiss. Try this the next time your boss hands you an assignment at 4:55 on Friday afternoon...Shake your butt and hiss loudly. Let me know what kind of reaction you get. (I know some of you want to do this, and are giggling like a school girl just thinking of it.)
9. You can get away with anything. You can chase your tail, the dog's tail, the sunbeam, lie in wait and pounce on your human's feet...And humans simply shrug and say, "Crazy cat" whilst chuckling. (Fidget asked me what the hell was wrong with me when I tried to pounce on her feet. All in the name of research, my friends.)

I know that Letterman's lists always have 10 items...I'm not Letterman. Can you come up with any more ideas? Or perhaps some other odd things for me to do to Fidget?

Illness Happens

2006-02-24T10:44:00.000-08:00

I hate the flu. I've had it for 3 miserable days. I didn't even go to class today. I hate missing class almost as much as I hate being sick. Will be back when I'm feeling more alive. Hopefully in the next day or so.

Heat Wave

2006-02-21T15:14:00.000-08:00

It's 32 today! I didn't even have to wear a jacket when I ran to the store. The breeze is still a bit brisk, but compared to 40 below, this is spring!

Had a nice day off yesterday...Went car shopping, and to the store to get the dog a new chew toy. Nothing exciting, but a nice, relaxing day.

Watched SAW II last night. Great movie, highly recommend it. I wasn't really too excited, because sequels are never as good as the first...This is an exception. Fidget watched most of it from under her blanket, but even she said it was good.

We still don't know who broke into our house, and I'm now resigned to fact that we will probably never know. I now keep the gun in the bedroom, and I also now know exactly when I can shoot an intruder...So if one of you assholes is the culprit, know that the next 911 call I make from my house will be for an ambulance because, "I've just shot an intruder." (Thank you to Julia Roberts for that line.) :) In any case, whoever it was will be better off holding me up on the street. If my family is threatened again...Well, we're praying it doesn't happen again.

That's the current report from here in La-La land.

Inner Tantrum

2006-02-18T08:31:00.000-08:00

Fidget and I have been talking about buying a third vehicle. We were thinking of an older, smaller truck/SUV. Something we can drop the tailgate on and throw in a few bags of leaves and grass to take to the burn site. Or haul small furniture in. We were talking about spending somewhere in the neighborhood of $1000-1500. So we're not looking for something real pretty, right? Well...We live in Minnesota, land of the expensive 4X4. We can't find anything in our price range that runs. Yes, we are being a touch finicky, but as neither one of us is any type of mechanic, we decided that one of the criteria should be that it runs. The closest we've come to our goal is a 1990 Blazer...It runs, but the clutch doesn't disengage. After ending that call, we amended the "must run" criteria to..."must run without someone having to manually pull clutch back out or put their feet through the floorboards to stop the vehicle."

"My" car is a 1999 Chrysler 300M. I like my car okay...But it's not a truck. I've driven a truck for the last several years, and I miss it. But for a car--My Chrysler is nice. Fidget had a job where she was driving between 300 and 500 miles per week, so "her" car is a 2003 Ford Focus. She prefers to drive my car. Sigh.

The biggest problem here is this: I am anal-retentive about the cleanliness of my car. It's okay to splash in a puddle on the highway...But don't even THINK about making a mess IN the car. Fidget has a tendency to "forget" to clean up the car she's just driven. If she's had a soda, the can will be there 2 weeks later. This makes me crazy. So...I was thinking. (Those of you who know me are already grinning...)

I bought Fidget's car outright, as in it's paid for. I still owe a little on my car. So I find this 1997 Ford Explorer Eddie Bauer edition--with only 73000 miles on it. A lady who works at a local bank drove it, and she and her husband bought it new. It is in mint condition. And it can be mine...er OURS...for the Focus and about $1000. And I think..."Perfect. Fidget can have my car (since she likes it better anyway) and I can drive the Explorer."

Enter Fidget into the equation. A little background...Fidget is very smart in many ways...but she can't handle money, has no budgeting skills. So the money decisions are generally left in my court. I need to be accountable for my actions, and so I consult her about my new fantabulous idea. And Fidget...who never thinks ahead about anything says, "So, how much are tax, title and license going be? How much will our insurance change?" WHAT??!! So I explain about the insurance, and how it will most likely stay about the same. I tell her I don't know exactly how much the other will be but I give her a ballpark. She wants us to think about it.

WAAAAAAAA! Enter my inner tantrum. I've solved the problem, spent no more than we had budgeted...And even given her my car (with leather seats and butt warmers no less).

Sigh...back to the drawing board...

Random Thoughts

2006-02-17T19:25:00.000-08:00

It's cold. Beyond damn cold...It's fucking cold. It's -11 right now. As in 11 below ZERO. The wind chill rounds out nicely at 40 below. BRRRRRRR!! So help me, when Fidget's kids are grown we are moving someplace warm.

I'm stalling on the questions and answers for now, as I can't find the damn list.

Watching the Olympics earlier...A woman actually came down the hill with a TIARA on. Not a helmet--a tiara. Not to be outdone, her teammate followed wearing pearls. What the fuck?! Oh, of course they were Americans.

A note to the 30 pound girl who couldn't get the outside door open today at the college...Yes, I did open the door without trouble. No, I didn't get blown off my feet like you did. Yes, I am fat. But I also know this: It was me who caught your skinny ass before you hurt yourself.

I'm going to go and warm up by the heater and snuggle with Fidget before she leaves for work. Y'all stay warm.

Blah

2006-02-15T15:12:00.000-08:00

Nothing to say today. It's just your ordinary average day. It was -3 this morning when I left for class. It's a balmy 12 now, with the wind chill right around 0.

I officially dropped Anatomy today. Had a nice long chat with the instructor, she's a very cool woman. I actually made her cry--by simply paying her a compliment. And we wonder why no one wants to be a teacher these days...

Valentine's Day

2006-02-14T14:22:00.000-08:00

I'm such a sap. I told Fidget that I didn't get her anything for Valentine's Day. Not even a card. She said, "That's okay, I just got you a card." Then one of the big-mouths that she works with called and blabbed about the 3 dozen roses I had sent to her at work. She loves flowers. I love her.

Psychology

2006-02-13T13:17:00.000-08:00

I love psychology. Really love it. I don't always agree with everything, but I really enjoy it. We've been discussing Freud...And that is always good for a few laughs. The instructor handed out an article entitled, "Freudian Analysis of Hansel and Gretel". It was written by Bruno Bettelheim, a 1950's Freud fanatic.

After much thought, I am dropping my anatomy class. I don't need it, and it is taking up way more time than I have to devote to it. It is a really interesting class, and I will probably end up taking it later just for fun. I've already taken basic anatomy and physiology, so this is just sort of an upper level refresher.

That leads me to my other recent decision...I'm going to try to get back into the nearby four-year university. I've taken some classes there in the past, and with the exception of a statistics class, my grades have been decent. Wish me luck.

A Brief Hello

2006-02-12T11:07:00.000-08:00

Welcome to my shiny new blog. First a little about me...

I'm a thirty-something lesbian from Minnesota. I live with my partner and small zoo of domesticated animals. She shares custody of her 3 sons with her ex-husband, so they also live with us part-time. I'm an EMT and a student. My other half, affectionately called "Fidget", is an RN.

This is my little space on the web, and I will utilize my first amendment rights...I will speak my mind. If it offends you, then don't read here. I'm not here to change your opinions, please don't come here and try to change mine. That said...Disagreement is welcome, as long as we remain respectful of one another. Teasing is welcome, hate is not. I shut my last blog down due to hate-mongers.

What will you find here? Hmm...I suppose this is sort of a knick-knacky type of blog. As in, "a little of this, a little of that". I have a list of questions that previous readers have asked, and I will start by answering those. If you have questions or comments, please feel free to fire away. I don't promise to be perfect with spelling and punctuation, but I will do my best.

Welcome to my corner, enjoy yourself.